The Chinese Box

Loose Blogger's Consortium (LBC): Firsts in My Life...not really

2011-11-12T20:53:00.001Z

This is a really hard topic for me so instead of writing something stupid, I'll share a funny video :)

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Welcome to the Loose Bloggers Consortium where Conrad, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Magpie11, Maria the Silver Fox, Noor, Padmum, Paul, Ramana Sir, Will knot, and I write on the same topic. Please visit the other blogs to get eleven different takes on today's topic, chosen by Anu.

Loose Bloggers' Consortium (LBC): My Wildest Fantasy

2011-11-08T23:08:00.003Z

When I have to choose one thing from a bunch of other things I equally like, I tend to be terribly indecisive. The solution therefore, at least for the purpose of this topic is to list 'em all! So here we go, my wildest fantasies...

1. Climb the peaks below:

Mt. Everest, Nepal

Goecha-La (K2 Base Camp), Sikkim/Bhutan
Photo courtesy: TripAdvisor.com

Mt. Kilimanjaro, Kenya/Tanzania

Macchu Picchu, Peru

This list is really quite long and I've had a hard time cutting it down to these four...which are reasonably achievable except Mt. Everest perhaps.

2. Have my own observatory in the back garden

3. Live in an entirely self-sufficient "hobbit house" for the rest of my life once I earn enough to stop working

4. Have a pet Elephant

5. If and when I build my own house (hobbit or not), make my room in a small lighthouse with spiral staircase

Hope you enjoyed the ride through my wildest fantasies...but now that this week's title has made me think so much about these, I fee like giving it my best to try and make these a reality! :)

P.S: Apologies for not having commented on other blogs and replied to comments on my blog. I was hoping to do it today but couldn't due to a huge back log! I will be doing it tomorrow for sure.
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Welcome to the Loose Bloggers Consortium where Conrad, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Magpie11, Maria the Silver Fox, Noor, Padmum, Paul, Ramana Sir, Will knot, and I write on the same topic. Please visit the other blogs to get eleven different takes on today's topic, chosen by Gaelikaa.

Loose Bloggers' Consortium (LBC): Focus...with some Reflection & Gratitude List

2011-10-30T22:34:00.001Z

There are things we all experience which are hard to come to terms with. Some occur as a direct consequence of our own actions while with some other events, we tend to get dragged in somehow. It may take very long to put the pieces together of this grand puzzle we inadvertently become a part of. Some others, we may never manage to come to terms with. The last few weeks while I was away from LBC and other regular activities on and offline, all I was really doing was trying to convince myself that I am busy. Working insane number of hours, forcing a hectic schedule of social events on top of it (mainly due to Diwali), and trying very hard to run away from some of the old junk that squats in my memory-yard. This is relevant for today's topic as it made me realise how easy it really is to lose focus in life given the seemingly unlimited number of such factors that pull us in all directs all at once. I don't know about others but at least I have found it extremely difficult to keep a sharp focus in almost every sphere of my life thus far. While the perception has surprisingly been the opposite when it comes to the opinions of my parents, friends and other important people in my life. Diwali marks the beginning of new year for Hindus and my focus this new year is three-fold: Reflect, re-focus and express my gratitude to everyone who has made a difference this year.

Reflection

The past year was incredibly tumoltuous with extreme highs and lows. I graduated with better than expected grades, found a decent job straight after, got a place at Imperial College London for postgraduate study (it was always a dream!!), experienced divine bliss after crossing the Sar Pass in Himalayan trek this summer, found some amazing friends....while losing a few others, witnessing abrupt end to perhaps the most cherished relationship of my life, and passing away of a very close and dear friend. This friend lost her life in the earthquake that hit the Pacific coast of South America earlier this year. Although we spent only a year together in high school, the friendship was one of the closest and purest I ever had with anyone. I still regret there was no proper goodbye, it didn't have to be this way. As for the other disrupted relationships and lost friends, I only blame myself for perhaps not having done enough to not let this happen. Somewhere I did indeed go terribly wrong in not having recognised the true value they had. I guess some things must be lost in order for us to realise their true worth.

Re-Focus

Prime focus is not to lose focus again. Many of our losses are as a result of losing focus very early on the way. Not again. Other things to sort out include getting more organised, no more procrastination and not feeling the need to regret anything over this new year.

Gratitude List

Ashok: Thank you for helping me become a part of LBC. I understand now why you always called these wonderful people like your family. Grateful forever!
PVR: Giving the gift of knowledge so rare and unique. I wish there were more selfless souls like you.
A, L, C: You know who you are and you know why this hasn't been disclosed. Thanks though for letting me crash at your place when I was homeless for the last few weeks of uni.
Roz & Al: No achievements of this year could have been possible without your unrelenting support and encouragement.
Noor: For being ever so honest, supportive, genuine and one of the very few people I feel I could turn to without having to think twice! You would have been number one had this list not been in reverse chronological order =P
Niki: Can't thank you enough for sticking by me in the hardest of times over the last four years and putting up with my eccentricities. I pray the day when I become worthy of repaying your debt comes soon! I will always keep my promise of being there forever, never hesitate :-) Also, you get a free "sorry" with this thank you, and I know it's not enough...but still, take it its free, unlike lunch!

...and last but not the least, Sir Ramana Muser for giving me this idea of having a gratitude list!

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Welcome to the Loose Bloggers Consortium where Conrad, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Magpie11, Maria the Silver Fox, Noor, Padmum, Paul, Ramana Sir, Will knot, and I write on the same topic. Please visit the other blogs to get eleven different takes on today's topic, chosen by Grannymar.

Short poems...yet another filler

2011-10-24T20:40:00.002Z

Some random short poems, still couldn't get in the mood to write themed posts but will get there soon! :)

The lighthouse keeper would count the ships

...that sparkled in the light of moon

Waves devoured the stars

...and the foghorn played with the winds

***

Sunday morning sunshine, the smell of coffee brew

and burnt toast with marmalade on the side;

The lazy eyes notice how meaning loses itself after a while

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Oil asks the wick, I burn you or you I?

The light just smiles..and the flame sighs

Almost back..!!

2011-10-23T22:25:00.002Z

Hello everyone (esp. the LBC), despite promising to be back by today on LBC, I've not really found the "peace of mind" and indeed a silent hour to be able to write as of yet. I positively hope to officially return by tomorrow or latest by Tuesday night GMT when I will begin blogging and replying to all those comments. Until then, here's one of my favourite song to fill this page and make some of the older followers of this blog a little nostalgic - Here comes the sun by George Harrison :-)

Marriage: An Oriental Perspective - Loose Bloggers' Consortium (LBC)

2011-09-24T00:12:00.000Z

Welcome to the Loose Bloggers Consortium, where Akanksha, Anu, Ashok, Conrad, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Ordinary Joe, Magpie11, Maria the Silver Fox, Nema, Noor, Padmum, Paul, Ramana Sir, Will knot, and I write on the same topic. Please visit the other blogs to get seventeen different takes on today's topic, chosen by Conrad.

The concept of marriage in Indian culture is rooted in the philosophy expounded by the Vedas which practically touch every aspect of human life and the sphere of activities. Contrary to popular belief, there is nothing religious about them, at least as far as the traditional western conception of religion goes. You may just be surprised to see the similarities with what it means in other cultures. Moreover, some of the things they talk about are so generic, they really can be applied right across the board no matter what one's faith is. Marriage is considered to be the fundamental unit of society. To use an analogy, married couple and their family is like the cell in our body, several such cells make tissue (several married couples/families = local community). A group of such tissues forms our organs (several local communities = society). Several organs with certain similarities form organ systems, e.g. nose, wind pipe, lungs form the respiratory system (many societies with similar belief systems, customs and traditions = region). Several organ systems ultimately form our body (several diverse regions = nation). In our body, mutation in a single cell may give rise to a tumour which if unchecked, can spread across the body with systemic manifestations and this cancer ultimately leads to destruction. Dysfunctional marriages break down families, broken families lead to displaced individuals who having lost their way in life are vulnerable to follow wrong paths. This is the beginning of cancer. If it spreads, the society is driven on a course of self-destruction. Destroyed societies lead to downfall of nations or civilisations. Therefore, the bottom line is that saying whether or not one should marry is a personal choice and nobody else has the right to interfere with it is not good enough. When individual liberties encroach upon the social welfare, the forces that bind such societies together have every right to check these freedoms in question. A common approach in treating cancer is killing all tumour cells. Similarly, the only effective approach to prevent, avoid and avert societal disintegration can only be nipping the tumour of dysfunctional marriages in the bud, by eradicating ideologies which give rise to such tendencies. Unfortunately the case in India today is quite the opposite.

In Indian culture, even marriage is based on the concept of "detachment in attachment". One of the treatises that deal with structure and functioning of an ideal society ("Manusmiriti" or The Code of Manu) describe it thus: Human life (assuming a life span of a 100 years) is divided in 4 quarters, each lasting roughly 25 years. The first quarter is all about following complete chastity, purity of thought, word and deed, gaining knowledge and skills necessary for one's chosen profession and so forth. In ancient times, when a child was between seven to eight years old, he would be sent to the teacher's house for a period of 18 years to gain knowledge and learn the importance of service and surrender. The child was not allowed to ever see his parents for this 18 years period and was expected to treat the teacher and his or her family as his own. At 25, the child would return home to his parents, get married and start his own family. Bear in mind that by the time a child turns 25, the parents are about 50 years old. Between 25-50, a person would be expected to enjoy all aspects of marital life and engage in productive work. By doing so, one should earn wealth with an aim to distribute it for the needy once the family needs are taken care of. Such a householder is the foundation of society where every act one performs is supposed to be selfless. If one earns money, it should be with a desire to use it for right purposes; if one begets offspring, it should be with an intention that these children are a debt I owe to the society - my duty is to raise them such that they continue the tradition of self-less service to their society, nation and the whole world. At 50, one would be expected to leave family, possessions and society and depart for pilgrimage, following which they must dedicate the next 20-25 years in self-less service to the society in any capacity feasible. When they eventually become old and unable to work, at about 75 years old or so, they should retire to a secluded place, and spend their remaining days in spiritual pursuit. This could then involve following whichever means of praying one feels strongly about. Some would choose meditation and silence, others would choose another form of praying, yet others who are still able bodied may decide to continue with selfless service.

I must highlight a few things here. The above mentioned things were only and only expected of a male child. Patriarchal society to blame? Not quite. All spiritual traditions in the spectrum of Indian philosophy have one thing in common, a belief in complete surrender and respect to women. This is because above all, Mother is considered to be the supreme most object of respect because she is the one who brings life to this plane and sustains it. Women are not required to undergo such austerities and it is said in the scriptures that for women, the easiest way to reach the "kingdom of God" is to simply engage in what comes to them naturally, things such as being true to their caring and affectionate nature regardless of the activities they are involved in. For this reason alone, if one observes carefully, in the 4 divisions of life, women only leave their parents to live with their husbands at the age of 25. Until then they enjoy all the happiness and luxuries of being with their families. However, in those times, as parents would leave the house at 50, it only made sense that the woman moves in with her husband. As the husbands parents would leave their house soon after anyway, the net effect is that the husband and wife stay together by themselves with their children.

Another very interesting thing is the words in Sanskrit for a married man and woman. A married man is known as "grihastha" literally meaning "the one who lives in the house". A married woman, however, is called "grihini" literally meaning "the one who possesses (owns) the house". What's more, it is considered a sin for a married man to be at home between the hours of sunrise and sunset, a bigger sin yet to rest while at work unless for genuine reasons and an even bigger sin if he doesn't treat his wife as an equal. Whoever says women are powerless in Indian society due to cultural reasons, here is the answer. It is a lack of awareness and understanding of the culture by the people which causes the problems we see today. It is a complete disregard for scriptural injunctions and a know-it-all attitude with a tendency to follow one's own whims and fancies more than what is morally and culturally appropriate that is to blame. The divisions of society and of human life are balanced. Any deviation from this is perversion at best and sacrilege at worse!

Breath - Loose Bloggers Consortium (LBC)

2011-09-18T22:58:00.000Z

Breathe free while you can, they may start taxing Oxygen sooner than we'd like to imagine!

Love, Revenge and Justice

2011-09-15T19:06:00.002Z

Over the past few days I have been thinking. This itself should suffice as a breaking news bulletin. However, this time the thinking managed to yield a little something useful, at least for myself. It all began with a rather lengthy conversation with a very good friend. It was an exercise in "freeing up" some space in mind's hard disk so to speak. Cutting the chase, it was about a certain issue both of us have been facing since a few months now. Although the particulars differ, the bottom line is same, its about experiences of riding emotional roller coasters. A common theme soon appeared, and that was mainly around three things - love, revenge, memory. Following is simply a screen dump of the toxic waste this created in my cerebral cavity, just free flowing thoughts resulting from that conversation. This friend I mentioned suffered from a major heart break that is stopping her from moving on in life. This followed what she prefers calling as injustice by a certain selfish individual who struck her life like a lightening, only to have left a few years later leaving behind significant damage. This led her to believe that love is fake, revenge is justified and memory (and a good memory at that) is not always a gift. This is what I have been thinking about.

Firstly, I am still not entirely sure what this thing love is all about. Of course I understand the classification, definitions, implications and consequences. Nonetheless, the thing I don't quite grasp is its relevance. Is every human being capable of love, at least in the sense this emotion is understood by the masses? Is it ever possible to love but not love at the same time? Is love possible without attachment? If there is no attachment, can it be called love? Is love minus attachment just as credible? I don't mean commitment, faithfulness, loyalty, etc as is the case in a romantic relationship...those things are paramount. The only problem I have is with attachment. Maybe this is total nonsense. But something inside me makes me feel it may just work if done the right way.

Second point on agenda was revenge. This friend of mine now seeks revenge, but her idea of revenge is pretty unusual from what I have been exposed to so far. She has a very elaborate plan of wreaking havoc in this person's life, systematically, steadily, one step at a time, in a way that the memory of this wrong doing never fades from his mind. I feel somewhat ashamed that the primary advice she wanted from me was whether the plan would work and if I could suggest any improvements to cause even more damage. Regardless, having taken an indifferent stance in this matter, I feel better about myself now. This made me think about the nature of revenge. I remember reading many years ago a quote by Sir Francis Bacon - "Revenge is a kind of wild justice; which the more man's nature runs to, the more ought law to weed it out". It has only started to make sense now. However, is revenge always by definition wrong? Or are there acceptable forms of revenge? I have come to understand over time that its not really what we do but our intentions behind doing it that matter. Looking at it from this perspective, could revenge taken only with an intention to establish justice and bring someone who has a habit to do injustice to account be considered acceptable? Well one argument may well be that this is not revenge any more then because there is no personal satisfaction involved. However, is it worth all the time and energy spent to achieve it?

As for the third point, well I've written enough to continue with that. It was quite insignificant compared to these two heavy weights so I'll just leave it for now.

*In case anyone is wondering what's that picture doing up there...it is meant to be suggestive. It is a photograph of different patterns created by smoke. Just a subtle innuendo that maybe smoke isn't always bad, perhaps it too has beauty of its own :)

Things I don't tell about myself - Loose Blogger's Consortium (LBC)

2011-09-09T23:23:00.003Z

This topic really made me feel like it is some kind of a rite of passage to become a part of the "inner circle" of what I always like to describe as elite group of bloggers - LBC! Fair enough, challenge accepted. Here I am coming clean as never before and some of the things I say are leaving the deep dark chambers of my mind for the first time ever. Not that they are dark things per se. The reason I never mentioned them to anyone is not because I wouldn't want people to know about it, but simply the fact that a few of those things have caused unnecessary controversy in the past which made me adapt a policy to shut up whenever possible about them; while other things have simply always been out of scope in most conversations I have had with people so never felt the need to disclose them. Here we go then:

I really am 22 years old, or will be in a few days. I feel the need to emphasise this sometimes as it gets overlooked way too often. Though I never mention this.
There occurred a drastic change in my personality and behaviour all of a sudden when I was about ten years old. People who knew me before then would not only not recognise me now in anyway, but would refuse to believe what they see as well. I have recently been told a few of these people have been stalking my blog out of curiosity, and this one is especially for them. You know it, if you know it.
I used to be extremely short tempered and violent before then. It's a joke if you see me now.
I spent more time out of classroom than inside for being one of the troublemakers in school.
I am a teetotal. At the risk of sounding boastful, I am too good at disguising it at social events. Nobody knows this and if some people knew, they wouldn't believe for a second.
I used to be an atheist and a communist. Then I started thinking. Which meant I thought I knew it all. Until I discovered spirituality. Which made me realised I had lost the plot for too long. Now I know its best when you know nothing.
I am an idealist and a perfectionist in everything I do. This does not mean I am a tidiness freak, quite the contrary in fact if you look at my room (I believe in entropy-natural law of chaos). Not necessarily expecting others to be so, though still subtly and indirectly encouraging people to strive for perfection.
I believe in fate. Learnt it the hard way. Too convinced to turn around.
I am what some may call a man of principles and morals, tipping over to puritanism at times. This is because I believe from experience that it is very much possible and practical to have morals/principles in life and live by them.
There was a time when I found basic spelling and grammar of English more difficult than rocket science. This time was not too long ago. I realised that times do change. I am better at English now than I am with my mother tongue. Shame on me, or maybe not.
I ran away from home at the age of twelve in search of knowledge. Got robbed at the train station, had to walk home in heavy rain and make up an excuse for where I had been all day. My parents would be in shock if they learn of this.
I have been slapped by a monkey for imitating it. This is not a joke. I still like monkeys.
I was terrified of ants when I was too young to start forming memories.
I am very committed when it comes to relationships that matter.
Those who know this can testify the extent to which I can and have gone for love (of anything/anyone). The same people would, however, want to shoot me if they knew that if need be, I can be equally scheming and cunning in plotting elaborate traps to destroy the enemy. I believe in loving the enemy and hating the vice.
There are some memories I wish I could hide forever, even from myself. I know I shall find peace only when I manage to free myself from these.
I tend to have a highly philosophical perspective to most things, which could be rather unnerving for some who belong to the reductionist school of thought.
I detest the contemporary education and political system. I believe there is a solution. I recognise the solution is impossible to apply in current circumstances and these times. I stop bothering, though still feeling bad for those who suffer.
My only joy in life is travelling and trekking. If it was up to me, I'd have a permanent base up in the mountains.
One day when I am older (than I am now), I wish to give up everything to settle in some small Indian village running a school or something...writing, travelling and eventually getting away from civilisation to spend my last days in peace in some remote forest on a mountain.

This list will never end...Hope you enjoyed reading :-)

Echoes of Silence - Chapter 1

2011-09-07T20:39:00.000Z

Hello everyone,

This may come as a bit of a surprise to some. I am starting a new series on my blog today, in which I will be posting chapters from the novel I am trying to write in their true sequence. I would be most grateful for any help readers could provide by honestly critiquing the work and of course, any advice would be appreciated.

I hope you enjoy reading. The title is still undecided, but tentatively I have decided on "Echoes of Silence" which is also a title of one of my old poems. More than anything, this is my attempt at experimenting with a different style of writing, which combines elements of suspense, comedy and surrealism simultaneously, hopefully giving readers a chance to explore these rather paradoxical emotions in one go. No idea how successful it would be, but no harm trying!

Enjoy, comment, critique..Thank you! :-)

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The Rain

The rain did not stop, many hours had passed. I was standing in the window of my second floor apartment on a typical Sunday morning, trying to make sense of what was going on. The scene on the street below was ordinary, yet there was a strange air of mystery to those otherwise mundane ongoings. There was a little boy enjoying the rain, sailing his paper boats on the water logged street. Passers-by had been waiting for nearly over an hour in the shops on the other side of the street, hoping for the rain to stop. The rain did not stop though. If anything, the downpour was getting worse with the running hands of the clock. A few cars had broken down due to water clogging their engines; their grumbling, thick black smoke from their exhausts and the helpless attempts of their drivers to get them running again were all adding to the richness of this scene. The rain still did not stop. The little boy had got fed up of all his boats sinking due to the rain. An intelligent fruit seller observing this offered to hold his umbrella over the boat. Seeing them sailing on the high puddles, looking mighty as if in the high seas, the child's pride was very much visible in that priceless smile! There was a surreal symphony between the battering rain drops and cacophony on the street. Some children, slightly older than the child sailing paper boats were trying to catch fish in the water logged on that street. Perhaps innocence was the only thing the rain was not able to wash away. It was 9.15am. I was struggling to realise that the two hands of the clock are of different length, thinking for a moment there was only one arm going round the dial.

In the background, kettle was brewing tea. Its aroma filled the room. I was spoilt for choice, should I shut the window and enjoy this smell, or should I stick my head out of the window and take in the beautiful fragrance of earth after rain. The rain had still not stopped. News channels were flashing the same headlines as they were the night before. There was a slight chill in the air, but I was trying to live every moment of this weather. A strange joy was taking me over. It was like an avalanche, against which I had no defence but to be destroyed. The destroyer was only joy after all, a rather euphoric feeling. It was a mixture of content, happiness, peace and tranquillity. The clock showed 9.30am now. Only fifteen minutes had past, and it felt as if I had been standing there for years. I could still not make up my mind regarding my preferred smell. It was still raining. I was smiling. Still standing in the window, I was able to see the television screen in the living room of the apartment opposite mine on the other side of that street. The children there were busy watching circus, a clown with his red nose and patch-work attire was performing a juggling act. The audience were clearly impressed. The children watching this on television were in awe. I was smiling. The clown was showing full set of his teeth too. This is when a sudden though threw me out of that trance-like state. I thought to myself, "Would that clown really be this happy? Does his smile come from a happy heart? What then, is the source of my smile?"

***

The rain had still not stopped. The clock showed 6pm. I was sitting in my couch with a cup of tea, the tea had gone cold by now. News channel was still on. "Have I lost my mind?", I thought to myself again. Surely this was a probability, if not a real possibility. Especially after the events of the preceding week. But what had happened? I didn't seem to remember a thing. I looked around in the living room, and saw all newspapers thrown open on every inch of available surface. I realised why the news channel was still on, after days. It had been exactly a week since the calamity of last Sunday. They were nowhere to be found after that lightening had struck. It was confirmed by the local Police that at least thirty five were missing, and three bodies found on the scene. Thankfully none of those bodies were theirs. Then where might they be? If I had not by then, I sure was loosing my mind now.

The telephone rang, and I rushed with thumping heart and hopeful mind that it would be the harbinger of that much awaited news. It was the kind neighbour calling to check on me and see if any news had come yet. Everyone seemed to be more concerned for the children, and perhaps rightly so. We all loved them dearly. Where would they be? Where would she be? Are they even alive? All kind of thoughts gathered like those rain clouds in my mind again. The dreariness was growing within. I looked outside the window once more. It was dark. Everyone had gone away. The street was clear now, just the water, and the rain which still had not stopped.

Culture Shock - Loose Bloggers Consortium (LBC)

2011-09-03T16:58:00.000Z

First of all apologies for not being able to write for the past two weeks. Things were quite busy over the working week and weekends spent enjoying the natural beauty of Wales and Cornwall.

So let me begin this post by my first ever experience of culture shock. I had been in England for a few months, it was only my second month at school here and for some reason the classmates wouldn't believe I had come from abroad. One fine day the "class clown" came in all excited and pleased. The reason was that his mum was getting married. She had been on holiday with her friends in Tuscany where she met the man of her dreams at the age of 45, called her "civil partner" to announce the end of their companionship and her decision to settle with this new man in Italy. For reasons I still don't understand, her (then) partner was overjoyed, decided to go ahead to help with the wedding preparations and their two sons (one 16 and the other 13) would follow a little later before the wedding day. Bearing in mind I had never seen a divorced couple until then, this came as a huge culture shock. I didn't know whether to congratulate him or express condolences. Perhaps this is quite uncommon by the usual standards here, but nonetheless, more of a shock for me than it was for the others.

Having moved around so much though, I'd rather be on the receiving end of culture shock and continue with this almost nomadic lifestyle than be stuck in one place all my life. Even imagining living in the same house, forget the same town, is a nightmare for me. Now this would be one culture shock I wouldn't want to experience!

My Childhood - Loose Bloggers Consortium (LBC)

2011-08-12T20:03:00.028Z

Whenever I am reminded of my childhood, a sweet nostalgia sets in until my cheekbones are sore with pain from smiling. I was born in a small village in Western India (somewhere in that valley: picture below). At the time my Father was doing fairly well as a property developer and my Mother was a research scientist. A very odd combination for a couple indeed!

Anyhow, eventually they settled in Mumbai, where I spent the first 15 years of my life. My childhood during this period was shared between the city of dreams as some like to call Mumbai, and the small village of my birth. I could not understand this then, but reflecting on it now, I feel glad this happened as it kept my connection with the soul of my country and culture alive. It may not seem like a big thing but it is not at all difficult to experience a severe identity crisis for those who grow up entirely in urban areas. Whereas the time in the city was spent going to school of which I loved everyday, enjoying "urban" activities with friends and being groomed and conditioned by the society to believe the purpose of life to be tangible material achievements; the time spent in the village of my birth would provide me the much needed recluse and solitude. Life in this village was very calm and serene. It was almost like a gateway to the wonderland for me. I could do everything my big city friends couldn't even dream of!

The day there would begin being woken up by the chirping of a million birds and calls of peacocks. The early morning air would be filled with a fragrance which is very typical of Indian villages. It is a melange of dew soaked earth, scent of flowers, spicy aromas from the kitchens and the burning charcoal in clay ovens. The rest of the day would be spent wandering freely without a care in the world with my buddies there, and their activities usually happened to be of a more innocent nature than of those in the big city. Running along the river bank taking the occasional dip in the freezing waters of the early morning, racing to see who climbs trees fastest and fetches that tasty fruit, playing with stray dogs, riding on the horses at every opportunity we could get, chasing monkeys...the list goes on. It was a place where almost fifty odd families lived as a one big family in an incredibly cohesive atmosphere. The children were everyone's children. Whatever little they all had, would be shared with an open heart. I don't remember any of the houses ever having their doors closed, literally as well as metaphorically. It is here that I learnt the most important lesson of my life, that everyone in this world should be treated as our family...humans, animals and plants alike. These people from my childhood gave me just as much love as my parents if not more, although I only saw them only once or twice every year for a couple of months! Their gift of compassion is something I treasure more than my life.

Back in the city of dreams, well, the scene was completely different. Life there could be explained by a simple phrase, rat race. I have always been excessively curious and had an insatiable thirst for knowing things. (That's me with the tongue out in the middle with two of my oldest "city" friends). I used to keep saying to my Mother that I wish I grew up faster, and every time I would get the same reply, "one day you will say you wished you never grew up". I, however, have not felt a reason to say this as of yet. Perhaps I still haven't grown up, as is the opinion of my friends and parents, but if I am, this moment is yet to come. If I know myself well enough though, I am pretty certain it wouldn't.

If my childhood dragged any longer than it did, it wouldn't have been so memorable and joyful. Just as each season has its beauty, each stage of life has its own. There would have been no joy in spring if it weren't for winter; winter wouldn't have been a relief unless it came after the scorching summer. After all, it is us who have given names to these stages in life. The march of change and time is unstoppable. I live with a condition known as Synaesthesia. Essentially what it means is that my brain processes events and experiences in a slightly different way. For instance, it automatically associates quantities with colours, places with taste, and makes me experience time in spacial term and so on. This makes me view any period of time as a vivid multi-dimensional event wherever these events have developed strong associations that have then been embedded deep in my mind. I think it just enriches my experience of reliving my childhood in my memories now. Would I like to relive it in reality though? No. I wish, however, that I am able to pass on this experience to other children, whoever's they are.

The truth is whole, but at the same time multi-faceted. Each side we see is complete in its own right. It is only now when I look back, am I able to appreciate the entire picture in a much more holistic manner. Time is far from linear, and it only takes a slight change in perspective to see this continuity through the different themes of our life as the common thread connecting each experience with the other. The child in us never really dies. We are all curious creatures at heart, ever desiring more experiences, avenues to more fully express our creativity, opportunities to spread love and happiness. That is what children do all the time. They make everyone smile. Time and social conditionings simply add layers upon layers of thick dust on our personalities which make us more and more hesitant to let that child come out and play freely in this wonderful world. All it takes to let this child out is re-emergence of that innocence which we have lost somewhere along down the alleyways of time. Young or old, we are really just children of different age, each group having their own fancy games. Younger ones call it toys and crayons, older ones call it money, work and responsibilities. Most are born without a clue, and most die without a clue. Everything in between usually fades away.

London Riots, Educational Reforms and Cuboid Watermelons

2011-08-09T19:13:00.010Z

Initially I wanted to blog about the ongoing riots in London and other cities around England. However, after much contemplation I concluded that as far as I can see it at least and in my humble opinion, this issue doesn't deserve so much attention. Too much attention is what has added fuel to the fire. Solution is simple, just remember that if you spare the rod, you spoil the child! These rioters were only looking for an excuse to steal on a massive scale. The protesting was just a veil behind which they wanted to hide.

Another reason I changed my mind about the topic for today's post is because I came across this video on the blog of Nema (one of our new members in the LBC). You can either watch this video here or follow this link to her blog: LINK

One of the things I am extremely passionate about is Education. This is in part due to the fact that I have personally been rather unfortunate when it came to the quality of "formal education" I received, at least thus far. I believe the current western education system is inadequate at best, and helplessly redundant at worse. This video reinforced my views and gave me yet another new perspective of looking at things. Divergent thinking.

This is a simple thing that our social conditionings make us believe to be insanity. In fact this divergent thinking is precisely what has got us to the heights of technological advances we are enjoying today. Ok we all know that. The point I wish to make goes a little further. Our current education system builds instant walls at every attempt of the child to think in a way which is not accepted as the social norm. It is a different matter altogether that social norms themselves would struggle to justify their existence in face of rational enquiry. Nevertheless, the problem is systemic. As the segregation in schools is based on "physical age", every child regardless of her or his unique capabilities and grasping capacity, gets herded and segregated into the same group and is forced to fit in. Why does our society have this obsession with "fitting in"? I read somewhere the other day, can't remember where, that there was a child who was told from a young age that the purpose of life is to find happiness. When he was old enough to write "essays" at school, he was asked to write about what he wanted to become when he was older. He simply wrote happy. The teacher pointed out that his answer was incorrect, perhaps unsurprisingly, and he should work on his ability to understand questions correctly.

I could carry on rambling forever. To be concise, however, I will cut the chase and come to the point. As I come near to closing this post, I am realising that perhaps there is that link after all between the rioters in London and our redundant rusty education system. This production line manufactures half baked pots which can neither be used to hold water nor to decorate. Their offspring naturally end up confused and messed up than them. Its a sad story. Their empty mind ends up becoming the devil's workshop indeed. This, together with a total lack of positive role models in their community with whom they can relate ends up creating a dung bomb! The inevitable explosion only awaits the right time and circumstances.

I will write more on education later but for now I will end this post with what I feel as a very simple example that illustrates the point of divergent thinking this video makes.

Japanese genius at work! Who would have ever dreamt that watermelons could be produced in a cuboid shape so they could fit in the refrigerator more conveniently and save packaging and transport costs??

Moral of the story: If it takes cubical watermelons to shake the social and academic elite out of their slumber, so be it!

Greetings! :)

Unforeseen Circumstances - Loose Bloggers Consortium

2011-08-05T18:59:00.007Z

Welcome to the Friday Loose Bloggers Consortium where Akanksha, Anu, Ashok, Conrad, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Magpie11, Maria the Silver Fox, Noor, Padmum , Ramana Sir, Will knot , and I write on the same topic. Please do visit the linked blogs to get fourteen different flavours of the same topic. Today’s topic has been chosen by gaelikaa.

Today's topic is very dear to my heart; not least because over the past 22 years of my existence I've become so accustomed to these buggers we are glorifying as "unforeseen circumstances" today, but also because of their incredible consistency, persistence and determination to keep recurring and eventually making me so fond of them and attached to them in a sense, that I start missing them when they stop occurring with their usual frequency. Also, I can't discount their entertainment value and the opportunities they give me to laugh at myself. Despite all this, I still have no idea what will follow in this post. I have no pre-decided plan or plot. What you shall read is freshly picked, but not necessarily ripened enough to suite everybody's tastes.

I remember an incidence from about 3 years ago. I had a painful molar for a long time before this which I was ignoring. It just so happened that once I was eating a sandwich of whole grain bread when one of the grains managed to dig a hole through the tooth's cap (maybe why they are called w-hole grains!). As a result, in unbelievable agony and excruciating pain, I was running around like a headless chicken trying to find that one kind dentist who wouldn't mind treating a patient on a Sunday afternoon. It doesn't stop there. As a student on a shoestring budget and meagre wage, I only had a third of the money that I would have to pay to get the tooth extracted. It most certainly was the "between devil and the deep sea" situation for me. Credit card saved the day only to be sucking my blood like a parasite to this date. However, it taught me a very important lesson - recognise problems early enough and don't delay in nipping them in the bud before they are big enough to be a problem. I would also go ahead to say that every single such unforeseen circumstance in my life thus far has reinforced this lesson.

Analysing such unforeseen times in my life as well as lives of my close friends and family, I have come to realise that there is a common pattern underlying them. They serve one great purpose, of keeping us alert and on our toes and tend to strike only at times when we relax. I believe and I feel most would agree that our mind is at its sharpest and most focussed in dire situations where an immediate solution is the only way to peace. Connecting all these things together, I feel that such circumstances in fact serve a much greater purpose, keeping our mind alert at all times. This gives it that edge of the sword which is sharp enough to cut through the darkest and thickest layers of ignorance and foolishness. It opens doors to wisdom and gives us a different perspective of reality which is otherwise hidden from us. They give us the ability to think around the corners and agility to be able to manoeuvre around them safely.

I have a strong faith that nothing is useless. Everything happens for a reason and all events in life, no matter how big or how insignificant, have their rightful place of honour in this master play. Everything is interconnected and interdependent. We can't escape fate which is one thing, but even events and incidents in life that we perceive or indeed experience as sad, unwanted, disappointing or similar are all important for our all round organic growth and spiritual development. They all teach us something. It is up to us to appreciate the beauty of these unforeseen circumstances no matter how much havoc they create. A storm may destroy a city, but only to allow creativity to flourish once again and rebuild it just as grand if not grander. At times such circumstances may make us feel like a victim, a prisoner of our fate. However, death makes way for life; indeed life is born in the womb of death. The circle always completes and nobody can trace its beginning or end. I always get a rather obvious and expected reaction whenever I say this to anyone. Most people say it is easier said than done. Most certainly it is. I for one though say this from personal experience. Having had my world literally shaken to the core and having seen all that I hold dear perish in the mighty winds of fate over the last few years changed my life more than ever before. It was in this desolate hour that this sudden realisation brought a smile on my face and it is still there. I simply wish that everyone look at the downs and the sorrows of their life from another perspective. Its dead easy. We simply lack the will due to our conditioning that it is inappropriate to find happiness in sorrow. Life is a paradox after all, not all is what it seems like. Answers are all around, if only we have the courage to ask those difficult questions.

Dreams

2011-07-28T18:51:00.005Z

I believe in one thing slightly more than others, the power of dreams. Dreams are what separates humans from other life forms. We have this unique ability to weave a wonderful mesh of thoughts and colour it with fantastic imagination which is indeed what makes us special. What I think is more interesting, however, is not the fact that we can dream, but we are the only ones on this planet who can manifest these dreams into reality. Thoughts have a language of its own. We can translate it into reality. This is by far the best thing about being humans I think.

It is important to put this in perspective. What is unique to say, for instance, a monkey? Its tail of course! It uses the tail everyday, every minute of its life. What is unique to birds? Wings. They use these everyday to fly. How many of us are confident of putting our unique ability to use? Isn't it true that most of us are afraid of dreaming dreams? We tend to fear dreaming about changes we wish to bring in our lives. Perhaps its more a fear of failure and disappointments than of dreaming. Dreams only hold good if they could cross that boundary between thought and reality and manifest! Life simply cannot become beautiful without dreams. Dreams define the purpose of our existence. Dreams are the path to fulfilling our destinies. No dream is too idyllic or unreachable so long as we recognise the extent of our potential and have the courage and determination to create our own reality every living moment, rather than living in the reality which others have created for us! This is where a very important point must be understood. The journey to making these dreams real is solely what gives our dreams the value they possess. Dreams are only means to the end, not an end in itself.

Life is that which we never know it is, and when it starts unfolding, we realise that even we ourselves are not what we thought we were. Slowly and steadily as one begins to comprehend the mysteries of existence and realise the truths of what we refer to as "life", one begins to become isolated from the homogeneous monotony of the mundane realism. This isolation at the deeper and subtler levels of our being is what equips us with an extraordinarily immense potential. This is what can help manifest even what appear to be most unrealistic dreams. Its just a matter of unlocking this potential and putting it to good use. Those who are successful become more and more confident and dream ever bigger and grandiose dreams, for they now know how to transform dreams into reality. They dare to trespass into the realms of pure vivid creativity, of magical transformation of their lives, and those of the deepest desires of their hearts waiting to manifest. They now learn to live their dreams, at times so much so, that a sudden warp of time as if it were, transports them from what were their dreams to what then becomes the very realities of their lives! All it takes is a moment. A moment of self-belief. A moment of confidence. a moment of determination. After that only the sky is the limit!

I would like to end this post with a quote I had come across a while ago, not sure by whom but something that inspired me in a way to alter my perception of life and sowed the seed of that possibility of believing in my dreams. All we need is to live by it...

"Dreams are like the paints of great artists. The world is like their canvas. Believing in those dreams is the brush which transforms those dreams into the masterpiece of reality!"

Calibrating Life

2010-08-01T00:18:00.004Z

This post is going to be a follow on from the previous post on Love. I mentioned Platonic "ideas" in it, so let's begin by a quick introduction to it. Plato is considered to be one of the greatest philosopher ever, and was a student of an even greater mind we know by the name of Socrates. Plato's theory was that everything we see around is just a reflection of the ideal and perfect original thing in the world of ideas. Basically, he said that all there are, are ideas, which gives the world the meaning. I do not intend to write about the world of ideas and Plato but just some of those ideas which I feel form the core of our humanity, around which everything revolves.

I was having this discussion today with a close member of my family (cannot disclose who) about heavy stuff such as morality, ethics, righteousness and principles. I can't quite remember from what this stemmed out of. According to him, the way we live our life must be dictated by circumstantial desires. For instance, if a person feels like having a chocolate, just have one. If he feels like sleeping, sleep. You name it. This, according to him, is freedom. I guess I wrote about freedom earlier so won't go into details here. I am just curious to know what your thoughts are about this and if you agree or disagree. If you disagree, then why and what is your alternative explanation.

I have come to believe from experiences thus far, that I do not agree with this. I am certain that life is worth a lot more than being treated as a puppet of desires. It is absolutely essential to have regards about concepts of morality, rights and wrongs. It sure is a risky business, where boundaries blur and human intellect may fall short of change. However, just like there is always a standard for measurements and things, there is a standard framework, which if followed, ensures that most certainly, life will be a pleasurable experience. I am not concerned with what people think about life, some may feel there is only one life, others may believe in the concept of a cycle of births and deaths. This, I feel applies to all. It's a standard after all, which by default must be universally adaptable and applicable. So then, I believe this standard comprises of a few important ingredients, namely - Truth, Morality, Righteousness, Discrimination power and Integrity. Truth is the root of all. Without truth, there is no standard model. Whatever is truth is moral and righteous. If one takes to truth, one without any effort starts acting in a moral and righteous fashion. This can only be achieved by the power of discrimination between what is good and what is bad. What one does is never good or bad, only the intentions behind doing it are good or bad. This polar duality is simply an expansion of truth, which can only be non dual. Finally, if one lives life in line with this standard framework, truthfully, morally and rightly, one develops integrity of character. This is a big thing. It makes the person worthy of imitation. What such a man does, others tend to follow.

This brings us to a question of who decides what is moral, what is right, what is true? Surely truths can't be multiple. For now, my conclusion is that anything which promotes the well being of self and others around, must be encouraged and done, rest must be rejected. Anything which takes us a step closer to our ultimate goal, liberation must be done. Anything which spreads love, reduce divisions and increases unity must never be given up. All else, which is divisive in nature, is to be loathed. What we seem to ignore is the fact that if we wish to see the change in world, the change must begin with ourself. We should become what we want others to be. Simply put, only those actions which encourage Truth, Love and Compassion must be performed, as they lead to knowledge.

Love

2010-07-31T15:26:00.004Z

Today I shall blog about Love. I know I still have to write about my trip to Venice long long ago, Italian food, etc. However, that's the joy about blogging/creative writing I guess. The writer is, or generally should only be motivated by such apparently random motivations, as they are the only things capable of enabling a genuine insight into the workings of his mind and heart. It surely offers a window to the readers about the writer and perhaps even an opportunity to think about the topic if it interests them. I always wanted to write about Love, but never came to manage to do so. Finally now I hope I can, well it shall be seen how the post unfolds.

Love is probably the most overused, abused, clichéd and misunderstood word ever. Not just in English but most of the languages. Everyone has their own concept of love, and most likely it is created by the environment, to be precise, media in today's world. Usually it can be seen that Love is only associated with a few things and these few things tend to make up the general idea about love that the public holds. I personally don't like to use the word public as to me it gives somewhat negative connotations about the people referred to as the "public". Anyhow, for the purpose of this topic, it is essential to separate the population into this public and the rest. Public are all the people who conform readily to whatever is perceived to be the "standard" or the "norm". Their opinions of course, change with the changing norms and perceptions of what is ok and what is not ok. For them, social recognition and acceptance is the only factor which drives any process of creating opinions. So then, having laid the foundation of the argument, I will now try to put in words what I feel about this idea. It may sound Platonic with the overuse of words like "idea" and all, but being a language with limits, English fails in this matter.

Love then, I feel is the most complex emotion, and hence, most misunderstood. If anyone has read Paulo Coelho's "The Pilgrimage", they would be aware of the different forms of love he describes. In fact I would like to credit him for being the inspiration of this post, or rather his book. Love is of different types. Each type is great in it's own right. In the broadest sense, there are 3 types. Love between a mother and a child, two lovers and unconditional love for everything in the universe. A mother loves her child without any reservations. Two lovers, truly in love, are like two bodies and one soul. Unconditional love is the love which one MAY feel for the entire existence and whatever it consists of, without being judgemental. I feel this is the highest kind of Love. However, if we look at this as a pyramid, then looking at our lives, lets assume this unconditional love to be the ultimate goal of humankind. Most never reach it and more worryingly, neither feel the need to do so. However, in our life we are touched by love for the first time in the form of the love of our Mother. A child grows up with the Mother's care and attention, devotion and love. This love is the foundation of the pyramid of love in our lives. The next level is when one falls in love with another individual and makes them a part of his/her life. This is when we take the love we experienced to a totally new level. Those who are genuinely in love would experience a deep feeling of oneness. It can never be expressed in any way. It can only be experienced. This love, if deep enough, can make the lovers one with each other. Its building blocks are faith, care, devotion and respect. They are equal. There is no difference of status or no question of an "upper hand". Such love is rare, but still some fortunate souls may just get a chance to feel it. If you notice, Love really is all about devotion and surrender. Love dissolves the boundaries of false ego. When two lovers surrender their self to each other, they unite in mind and thought. Their actions are in sync with each other. Their progeny is happy and at peace. Such love founded on surrender and devotion introduces a thorough grounding in our lives. This feeling of being well grounded ensures that our actions are righteous, as any unrighteous action disturbs this peace and as that peace and oneness is the original nature of our self, we automatically avoid anything which disturbs this peace. In an ideal world, families which are produced by such responsible couples united in love form a society which then stands on truth, justice and love. If enough people understand this, it won't be long before world becomes a happier and peaceful place. Thus, love alone has the potential to heal the malaise suffered by humanity. This leads us to our third type of love. When one is touched by love to such an extent, a feeling of fulfilment and satisfaction is established in that person. This gives birth to compassion. Compassion is the mother of this unconditional love. Ones it takes root, the tree of unconditional love for the entire existence begins to blossom. Full circle. It surely isn't that hard to understand, if only one realises the need to understand it.

After all life begins with love, then why not end it with love too?

Free Run, Hamsters and Learned Helplessness.

2010-07-24T23:29:00.006Z

It has been a while since I posted, and also been a while since I felt the need to begin a blogpost with this line (as I have to every so often). I don't know whether it is a case of writer's block or what, perhaps not, but I had developed a complete aversion to even thinking about my blog, let alone posting. Albeit temporary, it had kind of left a weird block in my mind, where I would constantly feel the need to blog, but no desire to do it. This entry is essentially going to be a free run. I shall type whatever that comes to the mind, with an aim to empty it so that I can fill it with fresh new trash! Which brings me to the two words mentioned earlier - Need and Desire. How do we determine what is needed and what is simply desired? We face several situations where we feel we need to have something, but it really is nothing more than a desire. It is not just a need or desire for physical objects but also experiences, reply of certain experiences or maybe just new ones. Over a period of past few years, I have developed this rather annoying habit of "mind-watching". Annoying because after a while it happens automatically. This made me realise something. We are no different than a hamster on a treadmill. I think it is safe to assume this is a universal phenomenon and not just limited to myself. When we understand what makes us happy, we inadvertently tend to recreate or seek new opportunities which brings back that feeling of joy. When we understand what makes us sad, we tend to avoid or manoeuvre around things which cause this sorrow. Finally, when from past experience we categorise certain situations as those where we are helpless, we tend to assume our inability to overcome it and thus, stop taking efforts to come out of those situations. I remember from my IB time when I studied Psychology, that there is a phenomenon in behavioural theories called 'Learned Helplessness'. According to this, when we assume we can't help ourself, we can't. This is because we just don't try. This theory was proved by experiments which would be considered abominable today. The behaviourists got some rats into cages. The floor of the cage was connected to a battery pack and every few minutes the current would be passed through the metal floor. The poor rat would get slightly electrocuted and would run around looking for an escape. Being in a cage, there won't be any to be found. After repeated cycles of electrocution over a number of days or even weeks, the rat would then be put in another cage-like box but with an open gate on one side. The floor would be electrocuted again. However, the rat, having "learnt" that there is no escape, assumes there is no escape and suffers by self victimisation. It doesn't even look around to see if there is an escape this time, when there is one right behind it. Humans are similar I feel. We wallow in self pity due to this "learned helplessness" and give up. This is one thing. On close observation, one can see that our lives are really a series of events which repeat in a constant loop. The loop gets us in a soup, which is really imprisonment. People have these concepts of freedom. Some feel they are free when they have a lot of money, some when they can indulge in their senses indiscriminately, some feel freedom when they sleep or eat, others have an anarchist idea of freedom. No matter what our ideas of freedom are, isn't it really just that freedom we all seek? We all seek freedom in one way or another. Regardless of our backgrounds, cultures, upbringing, desires or ambitions, freedom is what we crave. I read a quote the other day, and it left a deep impression on my mind.

"The only man one needs to conquer is oneself, and the only freedom one should seek is from oneself. The self binds, and the self releases".

If we somehow just manage to step out of the treadmill, we realise that we can switch off this crazy loop, that is the real freedom. Not being enslaved by our own mind. If we learn to keep our balance in happiness and despair, we reach that state of freedom. Easier said than done, but not too hard with a bit of a "learned helpFULness".

The Merchants of Venice and yes the Pigeons of course!

2010-06-26T20:28:00.007Z

If you do just one thing before you die, visit Venice! I mean no exaggeration here, simple and straight, visit one of the most beautiful cities on the planet. Although the day didn't start quite as well after last night's mishap, the hostel porter turned out to be a "locks and keys enthusiast", and surprisingly could understand English, though he didn't speak it. Talk about the effects of Hollywood! So well he fixed the lock like a pro in less than an hour and off I was for my first scouting trip to Venezia. Notice the word first, because this wasn't a proper trip. The rest of the day was a complete contrast to my experiences so far in this country. I won't quite say it changed my views about Italy yet, but I have just started considering it as really how it was back in the days. Italy is still much more like a collection of nation states with their own peculiarities and ways just under a common rule. Same is the case with Venice. It is not a part of Italy, although it could never have been in any other country but Italy. It is without doubt one of the most amazing places I've ever been to.

Considering it was a budget trip, I just wanted to get acquainted with it before a detailed tour later. Getting down from the coolest ever double decker train, I stepped out of the Venezia Santa Lucia station to behold the most breathtaking scenes ever. Where the steps of the station end, the grand canal begins with the stops for "water buses". As Venice is a collection of islands in the lagoon, the grand canal and its dis-tributaries are like the blood vessels of the city, with water buses being the life blood. So I bought this 12 hour water bus ticket which is valid for unlimited journeys in that time. First stop obviously had to be the Piazza della San Marco (San Marco square). It is a fairly large piazza surrounded by the San Marco cathedral on one side, a bell tower on the other, a market arena one the third and the Canal Grande flowing on the fourth. After seeing around there for a while, I hopped back on to the water bus for my next destination which had to be Murano, the place where the world famous Murano glass factory is. I don't have much to say about it apart from that as sadly I fell asleep on the boat and missed the stop, but well whatever it was quite late by then anyway and this is a must see for my next proper trip to Venice. On way back to Ferrovia, which is the water bus stop for the train station, I saw the wonderful Gardinia Biennale, which is a big garden on a central island where events like concerts and operas are organised. So this is what there is for now about the city and its sights, which I haven't really seen yet, apart from briefly sneaking into a big group of tourists as one of them and following their walking tour guide! Saved me €20 so can't complain.

However, as you may have noticed, the title of this post is mainly dedicated to two of the most if not THE ONLY important residents of this city. The merchants and the pigeons. Both share a similar trait, they appear when they are least wanted and move around as if they are either blind or feel the rest of us are ghosts which they can pass through. Perhaps they know that no matter how much people hate them, nobody can do anything about it. The point is, there are just too many souvenir selling merchants there and an equally annoying number of pigeons. At one point I was tempted to think that there may be more pigeons than all the drops of water in the Grand Canal! While on the boat I was taking solace in musing about ways in which all the pigeons could be collected together and sunk in the Grand Canal! They are the most useless and annoying creatures ever to have come about on this planet! Why didn't they just go extinct with the dinosaurs! Anyhow, moving on from the pigeons, we shall talk of the "merchants". If you are wondering why I am repeating the word merchants over and over again, it is obviously the reference to Shakespeare's 'The Merchant of Venice'; those of you who have read it, will know the reason. So these sellers are literally littered around. I counted nearly all the souvenir sellers in San Marco square, there were about 26 just in the square, only to realise on way back to the water bus stop, that many more were just returning from lunch and opening their stalls. The worst part is, they all sell the same damned souvenirs! Venetian masks made in China!! How ridiculous! The authentic masks can be purchased in some of the shops and a few of the stalls and they really are nice. They are made from papier máche and I couldn't resist the temptation to buy a few, though this was supposed to be a budget trip.

N.B.: Pictures from today will follow in the next post by tomorrow.

Italian Diary: One more disaster

2010-06-25T20:22:00.002Z

Disaster generally has a tendency to strike at the worst of the times. Here I was getting all excited to go to Venice tomorrow, and just the night before, the key of my room breaks in half and the broken bit is struck in the lock. How bad is that! So now I can't sleep all night as my door is open and does not even shut properly, but also it ruins my day tomorrow running around looking for someone who can get this lock replaced. I don't even know how to say locksmith in Italian! If I do find even, I have no clue how I would explain it to him. God, give me strength, but not even so much that I break more things like the "key". This key is quite literally the key to my happiness now...if it magically glues up tonight, I can go and have fun in Venice tomorrow...if not, another boring weekend lies ahead. It's high time, that "time" switches to the fast lane, its too slow in the far left/right (depends on the country you happen to be in).

A late addition to an old post: Hare and the Tortoise

2010-06-25T20:13:00.002Z

I wrote about a film I watched some time back under a post titled 'Hare and the Tortoise'. I just wanted to add something which is a perfect conclusion for that post and what I was trying to express in it. I read a quotation yesterday, can't remember by whom but it said:

'The worst thing about the rat race is that even if you win, you are still a rat!"

Weekend 2: Curse of Jupiter

2010-06-23T16:03:00.004Z

Jupiter was the ancient Roman God of Thunder, Lightning and Rain...and he was either furious or upset this weekend! There were little tornadoes forming on the terrace of my place, crazy rains and lightning so bright and frequent that there really was no need of artificial lamps. If Jupiter was sad, he must be crying and hence, the chaos, otherwise he was just mad for some reason! A well planned trip to Venice had to be postponed, due to an intelligent realisation. Venice, already being surrounded by and built in water, must not be a good place to be when it rains so much. Finally I have used other faculties of my brain apart from short term memory which is always so handy in exam times.

Week 2: Mission Impossible

2010-06-23T15:36:00.002Z

So I survived one week in Italy, and quite well actually. However, the way week two began, I grew restless due to perpetual nature of problems in my life. Before I continue though, I would like to clarify that I had gotten used to a bad habit by Italian standards, of living a carefree life which was also paperfree. Due to the Green policy or whatever, people in UK are generally clear in their heads about what they need the paperwork for and for what they don't. In this country though, it seems that people collect documents as a hobby. Whatever you do, you need documents. Not one, not two, but MILLIONS! This doesn't just stop at having to produce "official" or at least official looking letters, without which you are considered a guilty without trial...if you have no documents, you are lying! Strange but true. The university has a special insurance office which checks if the visiting and exchange students have appropriate documents to prove they are insured. Despite providing everything humanly possible, it was still an issue because the documents were not official enough. After long queues and convinving, I was at least relieved of having to visit the insurance office and worship them every morning and pray for letting me stay! Even God doesn't need that many prayers to be pleased with us. Well, only time shall tell whether they accept my insurance or not. My colleagues had already scared my by telling horror stories of how foreigners in Italy are made to suffer just so thay they will get annoyed and get ready to buy the Italian insurance which costs no less than £250!

Despite all this, I can be happy as I have finally managed to understand the secret about how most Italians manage to stay fit most of their lives! It all boils down to a very simple phenomenon, which I hereby "officially" declare as "official-mania", which simply means an obsession with everything official and basically running around from one office to another all their lives! To illustrate, imagine you have to prove that you won't stay in Italy for over 90 days. First, you go to office 1, where you spend half a day queueing only to realise they close for 2 hours every afternoon for lunch! Finally your turm comes and a very friendly old lady greets you from the counter, BUT she cannot speak any other language apart from Italian. Then you are called the next day and queue for a different official who does speak English, he then checks some of your paperwork, and gives you one more document. Now this has to be taken to office 2, where they will stamp it so that it can be accepted as "official" by office 3. Enter office 3, they work only between the hours of 13.42 to 15.17 Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays, or from 11.16 to 12.16 and 14.28 to 15. 28 on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Somehow, you have to be there at one of these timings withing ONE WEEK to make sure your document is valid, otherwise you will have to repeat the whole process all over again! Once office 3 takes your document, they give you a slip and a letter which you must take to the bank where you make the payment and get a receipt and another slip. This slip and the first slip must then be taken to the post office and receipt should be taken to office 2, stamped and then returned to office 3...which will finally settle your position and prove you will leave within 90 days! So you see, Italians just don't need the gym, and plus the ever burning sun in the sky burns more calories and sweats them more than needed anyway!

This is what I mean by Mission Impossible, which must be completed without any exemptions!

Sant Antonio Day and first weekend in Padova

2010-06-20T14:13:00.004Z

First weekend in padova was drenched in rain. Sparing the details, it was still quite eventful. An interesting Bengali lunch on Sunday at the place of a colleague from Calcutta, followed by a visit to the Sant Antonio Cathedral, which is Europe's 2nd largest cathedral after Notre Dame in Paris. Coincidentally, it was Sant Antonio's Day, which had attracted a large number of pilgrims from across the world. The Basilica is breathtaking, form inside and out! An amazing piece of Renaissance architecture with intricate facades, frescoes and unbelievably detailed scultpures depicting the scenes in the life of Santo Antonio. It was nice to see the crowds waiting for a glimpse of the procession and the chamber choir playing angelic music and singing wonderful Georgian chants. The place had a spooky feeling about it but at the same time was very soothing and peaceful. It had an unexplainable aura about it, which attracted everyone and kind of an absorbing quality which draws everyone into it. The paintings and sculptures revealed a not so good life of Sant Antonio, especially with the scenes of violence and torture. The place had a profound impact and instantly transported me to the time Sant Antonio lived. It was all so real that anybody would have the same experience. The picture to the left is where the Saint's tomb is located surrounded by an exhibition of the things he used, the replica of many of which were cast in Gold.

Days 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...Italy isn't that bad afterall!

2010-06-20T13:31:00.004Z

Settling down slowly, and realising Italy actually has another side, a very nice, friendly and beautiful one indeed...the one which most travel documentaries and postcards portray. Padova is a very nice little university town with frescoed arches and medieval alleys and cobbled streets. Life is laid back and people are extremely friendly and helpful. Its worlds apart from busy and hectic pace of things in London. Language barrier is a major issue but the locals appreciate if you make an effort to speak in Italian, no matter how little. I remember one instance when I got a free scoop of the world famous Italian Gelato at Grom's just because I said thank you and please in Italian! This place has a lot of contrasts, and finally I have concluded, that Italy isn't that bad afterall!

Day 2 was spent running around with my project guide to different university departments and banks to "settle my position" as they call it. It was a nice feeling in a way though, a typical tourist annoyed by the hot weather and unreasonable officials, looking for some solace in the fact that although, briefly, I shall be at the same university where people like Galileo had once studied. Days 3, 4, 5 and 6 were mostly spent in the lab learning about how they work and getting to know different people. Rest is going good so far, nothing terrific as such but just trying to acclamatise.

P.S.: The picture above is a bird's eye view of Padova, and the big piazza in the middle is Prato de la Valle, more of which late.

Day 1 - Milan to Padova

2010-06-20T12:42:00.005Z

With a heavy heart I am sorry to say that at least on my first day in Italy, it failed to impress me. Perhaps I expected too much but whatever, not up to the mark at all. Milan Malpensa is hereby declared by me as the ugliest airport in the world! I've heard more praises for the Jankara Market in Abuja, Nigeria than this place! The terminal building looks like it would collapse any minute, the air traffic control tower is like a huge iron structure, rusted from top to bottom and the luggage conveyor belts actually have holes in it...I saw one of the bags stuck in there. First impression was very bad. Still not having lost hopes, I walked out to to catch the bus which would take me to the Milan Central train station where the Eurostar City awaited to take me to Padova, which of course excited me. The bus was again in a pretty bad shape and the driver was a living testement to the legendary wacky and totally mental driving in Italy! I thought only Indian driving was crazy but the Italians have taken it to a new level. After about 2 hours, I thanked my stars for arriving safe at the train station. Train station was another weird place. However, being excited about the Eurostar, I was ignoring everything else. After the 20 minute wait, eagerly waiting at the platform, the moment came when I totally lost it. The Italian version of Eurostar is CRAP! Frustration! Next two hours in the train were ridiculously boring, outside the window there was these vast stretches of boring, hot countryside. I couldn't help think, is this THE ITALY I was told about?? This was nothing, however, as I was about to realise.

Train pulls into Padova, I try to get down, and the coach door is jammed. Train blows the whistle to leave the station, and am still inside the train. Someone quickly rescues though and I finally get down. After walking what appeared to be a 10 mile long platform, I can see the station foyer in the distance. My first sight, however, in Italy, is unbelievable. I wanted to cry there until enough water came out to sink that whole country! On the floor, there was a group of Rajasthani labourers with their wives, draped in the typical saris and bangles till the elbow and all that! I wanted to find a word with a bigger impact than Embarrasing. Where did they come from?? And most importantly, WHY???

Trying to ignore everything again, I got into the taxi to go to my residence hall where university accomodation was. Anyways, enough of whinning, residence hall was another chapter in its own right. Too much frustration for one day!

Italy Travelogue

2010-06-20T12:31:00.003Z

This post officially marks my return to blogging, once again. As some readers may already know, the universe kind of conspired to get me out of the UK as soon as my exams ended and here I am in Italy doing the much desired but least anticipated research placement this summer. The odds were against it, the trend indicated it to be a Six sigma event (the one which is statistically so rare, that it practically never occurs). Anyhow, all sorted, I am here and its going great. The following posts will be a travelogue of my time in this beautiful country ('bellissimo' as Italians would love to call it). It is a bit behind the time but I will make up by publishing several posts in a retrospective manner so that it will be chronological and easy to follow. So read on and keep posting your comments.

Ciao!

Birth

2010-02-04T23:14:00.005Z

It was a mid-summer morning, British summer so nothing exotic. I had finished over one year of IB and of living in the UK. It felt different. There was a change in me, I could feel it. I might as well call this a transformation, or metamorphosis to be more precise. I was sitting in my window, looking at and talking to the clouds (which is only my second love in life). There was a sense of renewal, freshness and fragrant joy. It may just be that first I was looking at clouds, had just finished my Epistemology essay and a sudden realisation of the change in me...but I was new. This is the first time in my memory, that I actually gave some serious thought to this concept of 'birth'. Is it just the day we were born? If it were then there wouldn't have been so much fuss about it with regards to the essence of this word. We are born every moment. Everything there is, is too. Whether it be the leaves of trees which are born again every spring, the cells of our body, drops of rain or even our very thoughts. Everything.

It really is all about change. Like the day mentioned above when I was feeling all new, challenges, obstacles and moments of truth in life kill and renew us every moment. There are three parts to it - Conception, Birth and Renewal. Conception or the seed of life, once sowed, will leave an impression. If it survives and is actually is born, then it leaves a greater impression. Finally if it survives to mature and realise the mystery of renewal, then it leaves the highest possible imprint. Impression on what, one may ask. It's simply the impression that's left on the mirror of our self. Most of what is conceived is not born. Most of what is born, does not reach renewal. However, once the renewal is achieved one can be sure to have found the right path. It is possible to forget these moments of renewal and the lessons learnt, no harm done there. Slowly though, the sincere one realises the immense power of these renewals. Essentially, I believe that having born is not the ultimate thing in the hierarchy of importance. We all get a chance to renew, to start again, to make a new beginning. Life is kind. The problem is, however, that we are clinging on the that which was lost so much that we find it hard to embrace this renewal. We are not able to celebrate this moment of birth! Every moment when you unravel a deeper layer of yourself, you are born anew.

There are two very important things I'd like to mention at this point. These are just the lessons I've learnt so far which made me reach this conclusion. First, the book by Paulo Coelho, 'The Pilgrimage'. In this, the author has related a pilgrim's journey to the journey of life. One of the things he talks about is How to be born again. The elaborate procedure is not of relevance here, but to summarise, it's all about digging deep within, rather than reaching out farther and farther. The farther you stretch, the sooner you'll snap. The deeper you dig, the more easy it becomes to access that immense potential within. So, if one is determined, it's never that hard to be born again. Second thing is what I learn't from a Gypsy's Tarot deck. Cards XXVIII (18) - Conception, XIX (19) - Birth and XX (20) - Renewal of the Major Arcana, contain the secrets to what may be the first lessons of life. She said one thing which I can never forget, "Everyone who is born, dies; but everyone who has born again by renewal, is immortal! For him, there is no death. His body may go back to earth from where it came, but the deeds he does, and seeds he sows are never wasted. They always bear sweet fruit." It was profound.

If we realise these moments of renewal and seize them, then we can enjoy them all and celebrate the birth. Every such moment can then become a flash of enlightenment, and numerous such flashes are bright enough to drive away the thick darkness which dwells in our minds. Darkness has no existence of it's own. It is simply the absence of light. Ignorance has no existence of itself, it is just the absence of knowledge. Death has no existence of it's own, it only comes in the absence of birth; death of the body, a thought, or that of renewal. It's the same state as stagnation at one level. Whatever stagnates, is destroyed...for good!

P.S.: It's been over a month since some of my blogger friends and I decided to begin group-blogging. We decided the first topic to be this, for obvious reasons, and since then had been making excuses every time the topic of not having posted yet comes up. Having said that, time has now come to really begin. So to introduce this quickly, me and my friends Introspective Blogger andMystery of Life will choose a topic for every week, on which we will all post. This will be open to comments and any further debates.

Clarification about the previous post, 'Hare and The Tortoise'

2010-01-08T01:53:00.004Z

Following my previous post, a reader asked a few questions about the validity of my argument. While replying I realised that the explanation is too long for a comment. So here it is as a blogpost. All follow up comments can be posted on here or the previous post. So referring to Nukul's argument, it's all a matter of how you look at the matter. One can either take a reductionist, rationalist, pragmatic or an inclusive view. The only way to try and answer your question would be to go deeper still and start from the beginning.

A reductionist will simply say, there is race, there are good and bad guys and there is a carrot at the end. I want the carrot, rest can do as they please. Rationalist will analyse every aspect of the argument and in the end will say, well, each to his own. Pragmatic people will think of this as an unrealistic thing and would say that as long as you get that carrot, nobody really cares how you managed to get it. The one with an inclusive view, however, would say that ok the fact is that there is a race, there are good and bad people, there is carrot and there is the need to attain that illusive state of detachment. How shall I go about it? Firstly, the fact that I am suffering due to this stress of rat race implies my own deeds in the past which brought me here. Now that I am here, there are two things I must do. Identify how to be detached while being a part of this world and master that thing in a way that once you are successful, you can lead by example. Nobody takes a looser seriously. A winner, on the other hand gets accolades even the court of fools.

So if one is intelligent enough to ponder over these complicated concepts of detachment, eternal happiness, etc. then one must consider himself lucky, become a winner in the material sense and while doing all this, still remaining calm, detached, peaceful and have a humble attitude of surrender.

Simply put, the answer to your question is, you can't escape the need to work in this world, then do it in a way that you don't get entangled at least. So that you are a part of the race, but not stressed out like the rest. You can then even concentrate upon enjoying the race itself and learning along the way. It's like Mario...he has to cross levels and collect gems on his way to the final stage after which he is happy. It's the same with us. We are helpless only so long as we resist the flow of destiny, and make the mistake of thinking that the doer and enjoyer is "I"...the moment one realises what the real "I" is, questions simply dissolve. Pragmatists, reductionists and rationalists should try this approach. There is no harm in trying. If one is still not convinced after experiencing this for thmselves, then so be it. All izz well, regardless of the outcome. We change, truth doesn't. Only that which is stable despite changes can be real.

Hare and the Tortoise

2010-01-06T23:44:00.004Z

I've been thinking for a while about the topic for my next blog post. While a friend was visiting for dinner tonight, he recommended me to watch a 1970's hit bollywood flick called 'Katha' (which means 'story'). It was inspired by the popular bed time tale of the Hare and the Tortoise, the one where the tortoise (who is slow and steady) wins the race...!BUT!...adapted to the modern society and how things have changed since then. The moral of this story was bit of a double entendré, so you decide. This post is not going to be a film review, but rather a narration of how another piece of puzzle fell in it's place in my mind after introspection.

Before I begin though, the nature of this post necessitates that I briefly introduce the plot and characters. Usual spoiler warning applies. So then, it begins with a stereotypical "nice" guy living in a big city, possessing the usual typical traits of excessive honesty, altruism, overly principled life, rigid notions of rights and wrongs, unambitious nature and a general inability to understand the machinations of this big bad world! He loves the girl who lives next door but can't gather the courage to tell her. One fine day, along comes one of his smart, forward-thinking, open minded, fast-talking friends who quickly makes himself at home. Mr. Nice Guy obliges and does not resist. Using his quick wit and charm, Mr. Friend manages to land a very good job at Mr. Nice Guy's company, that too as his manager. Effectively, Mr. Friend is a "bluffmaster", a conman who always manages to find his way by fooling vulnerable folks. Eventually he manages to woo the company owner's wife AND daughter at the same time, and while demonstrating his excellent multi-tasking abilities, he ALSO manages to woo the girl next door who Mr. Nice Guy loves like anything. Finally, he fools them all, and fooling an Arab Sheikh, flees to Dubai ready to carry on his business there. The girl next door is deeply saddened, but Mr. Nice Guy marries her. The film ends with a cartoon...the tortoise did win the race after all, but the hare arrived sitting on the tortoise's back and took away all the limelight, making the tortoise look like the hare's slave. Tortoise did get awarded with a bouquet, but of dead flowers, while the hare got fresh ones. Quite suggestive.

Apparently the script writer wanted to suggest that if one has to win in this competitive world then one has to be cunning, yes that's the word I was looking for. Perhaps honesty, polity, kindness, etc. are better left in the past, like museum specimens where the world could laugh at them. This is open to interpretation.

However, what difference does winning, indeed even loosing makes if all one is doing, is playing just for the joy of it? After all, the most successful sportsmen are always those who don't play to win but for the sheer love of the sport! Somebody's victory is another's defeat, and vice versa. Who looses now, may gain tomorrow. Change is the very nature of life. Just think for a moment, is it really needed to participate in this race? What we are experiencing right now, is an effect of what we did in the past. For instance, I am still not able to sleep because I drank too much coffee today. Then why create more causes and invite more effects and keep being obliged to participate in these races? What's the point anyway? I am not trying to say that being ambitious is wrong, but I strongly believe that it's not WHAT you do, but WHY you do it that matters. Intentions determine consequences.

¬¬Time and again I can't help but feel helpless for having to write in English...it's such a dead and superficial language! No offences intended but I feel so fortunate to have a mother tongue in which at most times, a single word is enough to express the deepest feelings of the heart! ¬¬

Anyhow, back to the point, and taking this at a deeper level of understanding, I feel that the excitement of victory or the lamentations of defeat only affect those who are rigidly attached to these concepts. Concepts, that's all they are. Would we ever trust a fickle friend? Then why do we trust our mind, who is not only fickle but only pretends to be a friend?

It's funny to be a bystander sometimes and observe life. We tend to complicate it so much! It's always those thoughts which arise from passion or ignorance which complicate things and create suffering. Why not just be a free bird and make the entire existence a part of our being? The infinite joy of that feeling of oneness is beyond words; its brilliance outshines a million suns! Is it really that hard to be innocent? Is it really that hard to be righteous? It's only being cunning that takes more effort. When one experiences detachment even while living in this short transitionary world, which is inherently unfair; then alone one understands, in fact experiences even the futility of this rat race. Then alone, shall the hundred petalled lotus bloom! Lifetimes after lifetimes, we keep running like a guinea pig on a treadmill, never even sighting the perceived finish line, let alone reach it! All it really takes is simply realising that if I want to reach it indeed, then I simply need to get down from the treadmill and just take a real step ahead. The freedom one experiences thus, is truly incomparable. We just feel that these little victories make us happy. In reality, however, they are just pushing us deeper and deeper into the quick sand of suffering. There is only one way out, reaching out to those who have succeeded before you, they are right there beside you...just ask them!

There are over 7 billion people in this world, I wonder how many think out of the box, how many understand the need to wake up! People always run after objects of sense gratification...some are mad for more money, some simply want to eat, some are crazy in lust, while others still are haunted by the desire to achieve material success which they guise under the term, ambition; some others are just too lazy to be even bothered to wake up from their slumber! If I had one wish to ask for, then all I would want is to never become a part of that group of people, and for this feeling of detachment to deepen and blossom. Sadly due to recession most types of genie lamps are out of stock, so looks like I'll have to fend for myself. So be it.

P.S: If anybody is interested in watching the movie, then you can click here to go to the link on YouTube. There are 14 parts, but definitely worth it I'd say.

The Tale of Three Cities II: 24 seconds...

2009-12-12T01:33:00.002Z

I recently came across an interesting piece of information. At any given moment, there is only ever one thought in our mind. This one thought lasts only for 3 seconds. Not more, not less. Next thought may be a continuation of it but it's a new thought nonetheless. Unfortunately I can't remember where I read/heard this so can't credit the source. If reader's know then please let me know.

Now comes the tricky bit. Upon observation, if one realises that he/she has 8 thoughts consecutively which are focussed on the material aspects of life, then sadly they are too materialistic! So that means, 24 seconds of material thoughts and you are exceeding the limit already. Ideally, they say, that one shouldn't have 8 thoughts in a row anyway, implying that you should have such a pure and uncluttered mind that it shouldn't need to distract from that peace which has taken root in it. If at all you do have that many thoughts though, then worry not as long as at least one of those thoughts focusses inwards or is introspective in nature. How many people have this kind of a mind? Some serious stuff here. We may not realise this, but we are so much into materialism, that it silently nibbles away our life from us. We may then live to the ripe old age of 100 or perhaps a bit more, but what use of a 100 empty years? Lucky are those who remember the only one worth remembering at least for once every 24 seconds if not more.

When the only joy for your heart is that of unmoved, immovable and deep silence, then it doesn't take long for the tree of love to blossom. All it needs then, is a shower of unmotivated selflessness.

Peace^3!!!

The Tale of Three Cities I: A Traveller's Memoirs

2009-12-08T21:07:00.007Z

Losing all track of time, when you enter the loving embrace of of life, everything feels so good, so auspicious! No past to regret, no future to worry about. Just this very moment. Its a different joy, something never before experienced. Only god knows how long have I waited for this moment to come. Though it lasted but a moment, it seeped right into my soul, where all was good. No strife of opposites, no pride of the ultimate is-ness...just bliss, pure, untainted. My smile too lost its joy, as it gently vanished in the fickle night. When will it come back, I do not know. Neither is there any anxiety. If it has to, it will. If not, still good. I feel weightlessness. When there is no burden of memories on your shoulder, walking the tight rope is so much easier, much more enjoyable as well in fact. Whatever we feel is owing to our memories. Life as we know it, is simply a memory. Past WAS a memory. Today IS a memory. When tomorrow will be today, it shall be a memory too. So where is time? Have you seen it somewhere? Well, I can't seem to find it any more. It only existed in our minds. This reminds me of the incident from Paulo Coelho's book The Alchemist; when Santiago is rescued by the wind. When all there is in your mind is just a collection of ideas and memories which are after all only apparent, then once you lose them...why can't you become a bird and enjoy it's flight, why can't you become the wind and carry the fragrance of flowers around, why can't you become the dew and quench the thirst of earth at dawn? Don't we hold our mind too tightly? If only we let it go and let the mind do what mind does best, let the body do what the body does best, and while all do what they do best, there is a perfect chance to escape from their prison! Transcendence into the next level of truth becomes so much more convenient this way.

This is the tale of three cities. The way to the city of gate-less gates passes through them. If you are but a traveller heading towards what lies beyond them, the vast kingdom of bliss which lies beyond the boundaries of these three cities, then why not just remember you are a traveller? Why get engrossed in the business of locals of those cities and consider yourself as one of them? Just do your bidding and keep walking. Eventually we all get there. It's just a matter of time, a moment, or an eternity...we choose it the way we want it. While crossing these three cities which are on your way, its risky to make a move during the bright daylight. During the day of those cities, disguise as one of the inhabitants. At nightfall, move briskly in the cover of darkness. When the guards sleep, the chance of escape is highest. Also, we will inadvertently make friends in those cities who would be more than willing to help us, for one day when their time comes to escape, they know someone grateful who is waiting for them on the other end to give a hand if they need. It's all about knowing who they are and reaching out to them.

I love riddles and puzzles. Puzzles are a good way to lose your mind and run further away from it. Fickle beast. That which can't be tamed by strength, can be by wit and intelligence. Better even, leveraged intelligence. It's like connecting different servers together in a network to make them faster and sharper. Hacking into and using what others have but are not aware of, is perhaps good enough. As long as someone uses it. Why leave it to rot? I guess it's too late now...sleep needed so the end for today. I wonder if somebody has experienced feeling less tired because their "mind.exe" process is using less of their CPU power. Battery life is enhanced so much if you just hit "end task"!

A smile can change the world

2009-12-02T18:51:00.005Z

"When someone has a tendency of causing sorrow, know that they are under an influence. Let your attitude be merciful, so that not only will you be unaffected by it, but also increase the possibility of transformation in them"

There is a certain someone I happen to know, and he is perhaps the "archetype" of arrogance and rudeness. I always wonder why is that so. Initially I always felt that he is just a crack head and should be ignored. I even felt angry every time he opened his mouth, at times even rage! But I always felt bad for him. Eventually I realised that many people feel the same about him. Some even hate him. As the time passed, however, and I got to know this stranger better, I couldn't help but notice this behaviour as an obvious defence mechanism he had created for himself. It was still a game of speculation but I was sure by then that what he does is only there to cover his weak inside which is so vulnerable to the unfair world. Some people just are quite tender and have a weak heart. Realising this, I decided that I will always be nice to him regardless of what he says or does to me. I was sceptical in the beginning but then I could see this work. He opened up bit by bit. One day he came and sat next to me and said he was sorry if he ever hurt me. I was surprised but then I was happy too. He couldn't control himself and began to cry. Never having seen a guy cry like this before did put me in a bit of a messy position but it was all for good. His own good I suppose. He said he didn't enjoy behaving like this. In fact he never even realised he was being bad until someone reacted differently to his behaviour. It gave him a chance to introspect. The reason he closed himself in this imaginary cocoon is because it made him feel less vulnerable as hardly anybody then approached him. He had been terribly heart broken in the past, for many different reasons and this made him believe everyone is bad.

I guess being a part of this race, and being so very social, it's everyone's job to make people feel loved and accepted. It doesn't cost us a penny. Plus you get to make people smile. Now going back to the thought for today above, such an influence can negate any previous conditionings which may exist in people's hearts. We cram too many emotion based conditionings inside...layers upon layers of them, which we can't even remove. One good thought can create a safe haven within the collective consciousness, just like a drop of pure water can make a clear area in a jug full of ink. Imagine innumerable such tiny clearings in our consciousness...how nice would we all feel? I am sure most of us, if not all of us would know such people who are controlled by their conditionings perhaps including ourselves. Just once, if we smile at them or speak kind words to them, it would make so much difference. I refuse to believe we are bad. Inherently, we are all pure and good. This reminds me of the 'hundredth monkey' phenomenon. It's very intriguing. But that, for the next post. Until then, keep smiling. Spread the joy. Life is too short to hate.

The three dimensions of reality

2009-12-02T00:46:00.004Z

I mentioned this in one of my earlier posts and thought it's better to finally refer back to it. Just a quick reminder though, this blog is just to share my thoughts, or rather a bin for my cognitive waste...so whether to ignore or recycle it is up to you lot who will read it. Don't take my word for it. Anyhow, so talking about reality, if we observe carefully, it has three perceivable dimension. Special emphasis on perceivable. There may be or perhaps quite surely are other dimensions to it which are beyond the scope of our understanding. We saw how reality is linked to thoughts. So the first dimension is mental. When you think a "thought", having a certain subject, it manifests into reality in your mental plane. When you express that thought using one of your five sense organs, it is converted into what we could call as the subjective reality. This dimension refers the reality being subjective in nature, attached to the personality of the one who expresses it. If I say what I think, my manner of expression will be subjective to myself, in terms of my character, my life experiences, my conditionings, etc. In this dimension, reality is still in a state of flux. It may or may not convert into the third dimension which is objective reality. Objective reality is what has a fixed net effect and value. I know it sounds like maths but the point is, objective reality is fixed. It cannot be changed back to the previous versions or converted into anything else. It is just there. It's effects can be measured objectively by those who perceive this reality.

A good example might be that of a murderer. This person thinks in his mind of committing a murder. This is a mental reality. Real only in his mind. When he shares his thoughts, he expresses them using his motivations which may be driven by one of the three modes of material nature (in this case passion). This is subjective reality. It's effects will only be linked to that person. Whether he actually commits the crime or not is still in his control. If he decides to finally do it, then he converts this kind of reality into the fixed objective reality. Nothing can then change it or it's consequences.

You must be thinking, what's the point of all this brain gym? Well it may or may not matter to the most. But if our goal is purification of our being, then it is essential to be aware of this principle. If a bad thought comes up in our mind, remember its still real, albeit on a mental plane. Real nonetheless. The crime has already been committed on our mental plane and we start accruing the karma for it. If we don't nip it in the bud, it becomes subjective reality and along with it the intensity of the karma being accrued rises. Finally if we still can't control it, then we make it an unchanging fact and the result is a full blown equal and opposite reaction to this action. An objective reality. Our aim must be to make sure that only healthy, positive and righteous thoughts reach this dimension of reality. All the rest must be gotten rid of. ASAP!! We may still be liable to face consequences, but then it's better to suffer for a bad thought than a bad deed. Of course, only until we reach a state where no bad thought ever crops up in our minds. Not many are fortunate enough to have reached there but we must all strive for it nonetheless.

There's my penny worth of intellectual trapeze for you. Hope it makes sense.

Adversity, inner strength and rewards

2009-09-21T23:31:00.003Z

"To tolerate and maintain good wishes in the face of adversity requires tremendous inner strength. However, the rewards are immense"

This is like burning gold in extreme heat so that it glitters even more, all it's impurities having been washed away. No matter how much you subject gold to heat, it only gives more pleasure to those who behold it. Gold, however, can only derive the strength to do it from its innate qualities which enables it to bear all this heat and still make others happy. Real gold is tested thus, so is the character of a man who is sincere and strong. Adversities will come regardless, it's how we face them and what we do in their face is that matters. Rewards, needless to say, is that we become extremely precious, one in a million, the one who glitters more than other raw gold nuggets around, fetching more value for our what our worth is.

Gifts in life

2009-09-21T23:22:00.003Z

"If you consider the gifts you have received in life to be given in trust, then you will have great value for them and will use them wisely"

Having a human body, a sound mind, a loving family, good education and camaraderie of the wise, if a man/woman wastes the life, then there is no bigger fool than him/her! Animals do not have body or mind able enough to comprehend the mysteries of life. Humans generally don't value them, although they are gifts given to them. A healthy mind cannot be possible without a healthy and disease-free body. Having these two, knowledge cannot be acquired without a proper teacher, our parents (family) being our first teachers. These conditions are perfect for spiritual realization. If we consider them as gifts, we will value them. We all make mistakes, nobody is perfect. If we were perfect we would not have been here. Point is to overcome them and not repeat them. Learn the lesson, dump the guilt and move on. Time won't wait for us even if we keep sulking over our misgivings. It will keep moving. Change is the unchangeable law of nature. We can either carry the burdensome emotional baggage with us in this journey or simply feed off of the things we experience, gain what we must gain, embed it in our being, make it our nature so its easy to use and carry, jump in the flow and relax. Destination shall arrive when the time will come. All we need is inspiration and determination.

Thoughts

2009-09-21T23:09:00.002Z

"A useful thought is that which brings value to you and others"

Thoughts create life as we see it. Thoughts are the seeds of existence. Reality cannot manifest itself without first being real on the mental plane of thoughts. The subject of various planes of reality is an entirely different topic in itself which there is no point talking about in this post. Thoughts either pollute or clean the mind. The aim is to have a mind uncluttered with thoughts. Calm, serene, focussed, silent, disillusioned. Good thoughts make it easier, bad thoughts make it hard. Anything that creates bad thoughts should be considered as poison and discarded. Anything that creates good thoughts should be welcomed and accepted whole heartedly. Thoughts direct our senses. A thought of killing somebody, if strong and intense enough, will make our hands actually kill! A thought of loving, if strong and intense enough, will make you overflow with love not just for your friends but even your enemies. Its all down to thoughts.

Ultimately even good thoughts have to be gotten rid of. However, it is easier to get rid of good thoughts than it is to get rid of bad thoughts. Bad thoughts will thicken the existing conditioning of our being which is already making it hard for us to realize the true purpose of our existence. Good thoughts will unwrap those conditioning layer by layer. Eventually leading to a state where your mind will be blissful. The field will then be ready to bear the crop of an enlightened soul. As everything, thoughts only have utility value. Thus, referred to here as useful thought instead of good. Good indicates duality. Aim is to go beyond it. Way is here. No scope really to complain and say I have no time for good thoughts. It can be a process running in the background, it won't hamper your download speed or any other applications of job, study, family, etc. which may be running simultaneously on your system. Not so hard then I guess.

Ego and harmony

2009-09-21T22:51:00.002Z

"When ego is out of the way, it is very easy to create an atmosphere of harmony"

Whenever we hear the word "ego", our mind starts working on all possible explanations and knowledge associated with the word ego. It's like as if we search a term on Google and it returns all possible relevant options we may be interested in. Now since most of us, either through upbringing or through our own life experiences have associated ego with a negative feeling which is a pre-cursor for unwanted emotions like anger, jealousy, hatred, self obsession and so on. However, is that really the case? Etymologically all it means is a sense of being. Simply put, identity. What we think "i-ness" really means. When we refer to ourself, we are thinking of ourself as the body, the mind, the emotions, the knowledge we have, our achievements, our understanding of life, our associations with our loved ones/family, our position in the society we live in, our identity in terms of the name given to us and so forth. But that which knows something cannot be the thing it knows. If I can sense an object with my six senses, then I cannot be that object. Subject cannot be the object. That which perceives cannot be what is being perceived! Therefore, obviously that which perceives has to be beyond both perception and the object being perceived. Who is it then who actually perceives? If I say, I see my hand, that doesn't mean I am that hand. It is an instrument which I use. The only value my hand has is of utility. If I perceive my body, then I am not the body, I perceive it as a subject from a third person point of view.

Considering this, we can quite simply break this whole dilemma in three things - the one who perceives (subject), the actual process of perception and what is being perceived (the object). That being perceived on a primary level is the body. That which performs the process of perception is our mind. Then who is the one who perceives, the subject, who is beyond the duality of subject and object? That's for each of us to find. This may just be all there is to be realized.

When one knows this, there will certainly be harmony. Life shall be blissful. Unfortunately though, its easier said than done. It doesn't take much to know, but it takes everything to realize and experience what we may know.

Introspection

2009-08-08T10:15:00.002Z

"Introspection will eventually allow you to see your true self in the mirror of your heart"

Mind thrives on change. It is a friend if in your control, otherwise your worst enemy in uncontrolled. Introspection is like a quality audit. Everyone hates it. If you have worked in an office, you would know what I mean. Especially when there is an external audit, everyone is running around like mad trying to get things in shape and order. They will stay late at night to finish work, take less breaks and do everything possible to avoid any audit findings. Mind is similar. When you decide to introspect, it will start cleaning its mess. It will try to hide or disguise unwanted memories and thoughts just so as it can make a good impression. This audit of introspection is done by the intellect. Intellect is mind's enemy. Mind is like a drunken monkey. Intellect is like a lion in it's face. A monkey, no matter how drunk, will be still with fear if faced by a ferocious lion. This is why introspection will bring out mind's true nature.

While the mind and intellect are thus engaged in preparing for and conducting introspective audit respectively, your true self is exposed. The self lies beyond the dualities. The self is supreme. Hence, if we know the SELF our self, we will know all worth knowing. Note that the SELF is different from our self. SELF is what we really and truly are. What we know as 'our self', however, is simply a projection of this self through the haze of mind and intellect. Thus, distorting the image itself. The self transcends everything we know or think as we know. The only way we can "know" this self is when we understand that there is nothing to be known. The truth just simply is. What just is, needs no reason to be. It was, is and will be in that state of "is-ness" eternally.

The heart is the seat of this self. Introspection clears the weeds of mind clearing the path for us to reach that "self-realisation".

3. Great and small evil

2009-08-06T17:49:00.003Z

Mingjiao said:

"Of the evil that people do, there is that which has a form and that which has no form. Formless evil injures people, evil with form kills them. The evil that harms people is relatively small, the evil that kills them is greater.

That is why, "there is a poison in a party, a spear and shield in talk and laughter, there are tiger and a panther inside a chamber, there are savages in the next alley".

Unless you are yourself a sage and nip these evils in the bud, guarding against them with standards of propriety, they injury they do will be significant.

(Translator's source: West Lake Annals).

Courage

2009-08-06T17:20:00.006Z

"It takes courage and determination to remain forgiving, loving, merciful and compassionate"

When Napoleon Bonaparte arrived in the Sinai region of Egypt with a view to conquer the nation, he was in a condition with which he could not even challenge a tiny tribal kingdom for war. His men were injured physically and mentally, their bodies were infirm and minds had suffered deep wounds of loss. They had no arms and his army's morale was shaken completely. In this, he said to them, "Although we have nothing with which a war is waged, we have courage and we have determination. So long as we do not lose it, we can conquer not just Egypt but even the whole world!" So they did! With just courage and determination they destroyed the Egyptian army and won!

The question now is, this story is about how courage is necessary in a war or battle situation. What has it to do with remaining forgiving, loving, merciful and compassionate? These are all battles in their own right. In our battle against the mind, which is ever fickle and unfaithful, at the end only courage and determination helps. We face numerous problems in our lives and find ourselves in situations where we have to be forgiving and loving to the ones we love, ignoring their faults and mistakes. It is hard. Especially with the loved ones, when they do things which shake your morale, they commit mistakes which leave deep wounds in our heart and act in ways which challenge your love for them, nothing but courage and determination works in still remaining loving and forgiving in spite of the seeds of hatred they sow in your heart. Of course it takes divine grace much more than the rest but God only helps those who help themselves, and if we find ourselves in situations like this, the best way we can help ourself is by remaining courageous and determined.

I remember a similar story a friend once told me. Prophet Mohammad was once being followed by a large army of his enemies. He was alone with his most faithful disciple (can't remember his name). I think they were fleeing from Mecca to Medina. After a while they managed to outrun their enemies, but the sound of their horses was coming closer and closer. They hid themselves in a cave. The Prophet's disciple asked him, "We will surely die now. What can we do? If we stay here and they come, they will kill us. If we run, we will die of exhaustion. Is this what I get for being faithful to you all my life?" The Prophet smiled and said, "Dear brother, if death is what Allah wishes for us, then what can change it? Neither our musings nor our prayers. What happens, happens for a reason. We must surrender unto the divine will. But if you ask what should we do? We should be courageous even in the face of death, and determined to die for our cause. If this is just a test, then our courage and determination will please our Lord and his mercy will save us. So fear not. Be brave and fix your mind in Allah!"

Another incidents from the great Hindu epic Mahabharata proves a similar point. The five pandavas (heroes of this story) lose their kingdom and are forced to live in disguise for 12 years in the forest. They along with their wife, walk for a long while until they reach a dense forest. Everyone is hungry and tired. They start looking for food but can't find anything. Finally the eldest brother Yudhishthira finds a single sesame seed. Now how can one sesame seed feed six people? When faced with this dilemma, he says, when fate has forced us to this length then we must not lose courage. If we are brave and courageous, this one sesame seed will not only feed us all but even keep us alive. So they divide this tiny little seed in six parts and pleased with their courage, they are blessed and survive these testing times.

We find such stories all over the world, regardless of religions or culture. These are universal facts. Sooner we learn to appreciate them, the sooner our life becomes blissful. I decided to use this quote for today's post, but just couldn't think of anything to write about it. Things happened during the day which showed me the way. Everything happens for a reason. Life is a very intricate fractal, every point has its importance.

I hope and pray that may us all be blessed with the strength to remain courageous and determined forever, no matter what the circumstances force us to do. Let us not be divided by the duality of thoughts, let us instead be united into that one, indivisible supreme consciousness which gives birth to the life as we see it!

2. Study and Learning

2009-08-05T17:41:00.002Z

Mingjiao said:

"The study of saints and sages is certainly not fulfilled in one day. When there is not enough time during the day, continue into the night; accumulate it over the months and years, and it will naturally develop. Therefore it is said, "Accumulate learning by study, and understand what you learn by questioning".

This means that study alone cannot bring realisation or discovery withought proper discernment and questioning. Nowadays where the students go there is hardly anyone who asks a question to discern people. I do not know what they will use to help their learning and achieve the benifit of daily renewal."

(Translator's source: Jiufeng Annals)

Thoughts

2009-08-05T17:31:00.003Z

"Thoughts are like seeds, out of which grows the tree of our personality. As are your thoughts, so does the tree grows to be, upright or crooked, pretty or ugly; good or bad attitude and behaviour as its branches"

I have modified this thought a bit to make it more inclusive. This being said, no more need to say as you sow so shall you reap. What you do now determines your tomorrow, just like what you did in the past has shaped your today. Actions grow out of thoughts so make your thoughts pure, pure action shall follow. There is a point I'd like to make here about the three types of realities. But I will write about them later.

Therefore, we can see that in every religion/faith there is a heavy emphasis on purification of your mind. May it be through repentance, surrender, knowledge or purification of actions...goal is the same. Empty mind may be a devil's workshop, but a pure and focused mind is an angels' harp from which only soothing melodies can be created!

1. Enlightened Virtue

2009-08-04T16:52:00.003Z

Mingjiao said:

"Nothing is more honourable then enlightenment, nothing is more beautiful than virtue. Those who have enlightened virtue, have it even though they be ordinary people, while those who lack it lack it even though they be kings.

There were some people who starved to death in the ancient times but have been admired ever since only for their virtue; there were others who were kings but have been despised ever since only for their lack of virtue.

So the learnede worry only about not being imbued with virtue and not about being in the positions of power and authority."

(Translator's Source: Tanqin Annals)

Zen Lessons

2009-08-04T16:35:00.004Z

Zen Lessons is another series of posts I shall be starting today. Should be a good companion to the inspirational thoughts series. The first volume will be The Art of Leadership (translation by Thomas Cleary). This is a collection of social and psychological teachings of Chinese Zen (Chan) teachers of the Song dynasty from 10th to 13th centuries. Some marvellous gems of the oriental wisdom.

What I post here will be straight from Thomas Cleary's unabridged translation published in the Shambhala's Pocket Classics series. I am simply doing this to spread this knowledge around and with no intention of commercial gain. Author has been duly credited for everything. For further details read the book. If anybody still has issues regarding this disclaimer, then deal with them yourselves!

Character

2009-08-04T16:05:00.006Z

I will be starting a new series of posts from today. Inspirational quotes and a little something I have to say about them. Hope you get inspired and hope they work miracles in your life. The quotes/thoughts won't be mine but what will follow them is. So if you want to credit these or use them somewhere, don't use my name! I don't particularly like courts, especially for copyright reasons.

Today we start with this:

"When you build a house every brick counts, when you build a character every thought does"

Character sure is a dodgy issue in this day and age. People don't know what it means, what it's worth and why should one have a good character. Most importantly they don't know what actually constitutes a good character. Now I shall be posting my views on character building and things related to that later. For now though, I for one am very inspired by this quote. I feel like it gave my existing beliefs a proper platform to stand and grow on.

A good, strong, consistent and unblemished character may perhaps be the only key to a happy and successful life. Achieve this and all other achievements are but a state of fleeting glee! Nothing compares a good character.

Your thoughts please.

2009-08-02T11:57:00.005Z

The world is flat. The world is round. The world is so small. The world is going nuts! Totally, irrepairably and perhaps in a very complex way! Why? Why are people becoming so dependent on the internet? Next door neighbours prefer facebook than meeting up! How stupid can we get? We like to chat with friends than go out and have fun. Why?? I don't know. I am just writing every thought that's coming to my mind...in that order. Lalalalala...!!! I think Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince could have been made better. I had more expectations you know. Oh there is a police helicopter hovering above my street. Are they trying to find my neighbour's mad dog? I vaguely remember other people threatening to sue him as his dog shits on their porch. Well who cares, the huge palm tree in my door keeps him away. Wait, does that mean this stupid little dog is Palmophpbic? Ridiculous. I know people who are afraid of u-clips and staplers, but palm trees? *rolling eyes*

...BRB...

Crap! I hate cold calls. It was one of those most annoying telemarketing calls. For gods' sake I don't want to buy window cleaning service on phone! Plus I know the caller was not Martin as he says he was. Hmmm...but I feel sympathetic with those who work there. I have been in their situation. I'd prefer slavery honestly. How about saving endangered wild elephants in Africa? Sounds like an interesting job. I shall think about it. You know what I am feeling right now? Like an idiot. Why am I posting such nonsense? But I think it's fun. Makes me feel like I am an existentialist like Camus or Kafka...noooooooooooooooo I hate the memory of reading Franz Kafka's Metamorphosis! Why would someone write BS like that anyway??? I can write a 20 volume treatise on how to peel a bananana (have I spelt it write? Or is it Banana?) Lol...reminds me of a stupid annual day dance I participated in when I was 4 years old on a stupid Japanese song which goes something like..."banananana banananana banana...ting...bananana banananana banana...tada" ROTFL!!!! Embarrasing memories. Our teacher had specially made a kimono for us all and since she couldn't find the proper fabric she decided to use old curtains! I wish more people recycled like this.

Ok enough for now. I shall be back soon.

Slowly as I get back on track...I ponder time

2009-08-02T00:21:00.002Z

Life really gets quite busy at times leaving you no time to do something as simple as post in your blog! Well, one may say that "I am busy" is perhaps the lamest and most clichéd of all the excuses and just as it appears, I too believe it is. However, the point is, these are the moments when there is a possibility. There is what is known as a transition state in chemistry, where the possibility of conversion of reactants to products is maximum. Well, just so in our lives these are verily the times when such seemingly unimportant incidents inspire us to have a rendézvous with ourself.

Things said and done, where am I leading with all this you must be wondering? Simple. If we decide, even the tiniest of things in our everyday life has the capacity to lift us up to that transition state where we have a highest possibility of transformation. Take this for instance, lack of time. Makes us think about time. What is time? Do we really understand time? Is it an illusion? Think. Think. Think...If you say time is constant, then by definition it does not match the state of constancy; where that which is constant is eternally and immutably static and which is unaffected by any external factors. If you catch a flight to a destination a few latitudes either direction of where you are, time is changed! Leave this planet and move to Saturn, time is longer there. Leave the solar system, there is no time as we know it. So you see, here time is changing with the change in the location of observer. Anyhow, my aim is not to write a thesis on time. I simply want to encourage some sincere thought in those who would read this. Thought about the true nature of time, and how are we linked to it at the very core!

Take human life as an example. Let's say, that ceteris paribus (all other things being equal), humans tend to have a lifespan of about a 100 years. Now of these, about 35 years are spent in sleeping (assuming 8 hours sleep every night). 15 years in childhood, where we really have no clue what we are doing or supposed to do. Fine that we are children and our life is joyful and happy (though I doubt it is the case for kids these days), but generally, in these years we are incapable of giving any real and serious thought to the nature of life, reality and so on. Now of the remaining, about 25 years on an average are taken up by old age and a condition of almost to total infirmity and incapacity. This makes the total number of years we actually have for us only 25! Even of these 25, we spend about 5 years in acquiring the skills necessary for that glorious and successful career we desire, another 10 or so in developing/building this career. Of the remaining last 10 years, we in the east have our share of responsibility towards old parents to perform, serving them and so on; while those in the west spend most of this final decade left in what is termed as "domestic issues" (love issues, drinking problems, money problems and so on...list is endless!) Considering this, we really, honestly only have these 5 years in hands to think, know, understand what the heck our life really is! Is this enough? Think about it. Of a possible 100 years of life, we may, just may get 5 years for this and since most of us never reach 100, its even less.

Is a time period of 5 years enough for all these things? Although a fruit may become ripe overnight, it did so because it was in the process of ripening for several days and without those days this one night would have made no difference in it whatsoever! Question is that of the amount of margin we have. Given the imperfect nature we are born with, this most certainly is a very short time; and time is always fickle. A backstabber. Time is your greatest friend, time is your greatest foe. Choice really and truly is individual. We may make a day's life an eternity, or live an eternity in a day!

I know it's just my first post after returning back to blogging and you may think why this out of everything! But well, since I don't care about world politics anymore, bored to death of other issues plaguing this planet and unable to write poetry...what better friend to turn to than good old philosophy! It is the science of putting the burden of your questions on someone else's shoulder to ease your pain. You chose it though and I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

En pace...amen! May god deliver thy filthy souls!

Guess who's back?

2009-08-02T00:10:00.001Z

Dear friends,

So finally I am back to blogging since my release by the MEDUSA (Martian Emergency Detention Unit for Suspicious Aliens) after all these millenia. Those who missed my blog posts, which were useless anyway, you need not worry anymore as I shall resume blogging once more. The rest are happy regardless. Anyhow, now my problem is what to write. It was terribly cold and dry on Mars which kind of froze my brain cells, which is good in one way but particularly bad or rather non conducive for blogging.

Therefore, after much careful consideration, thought and of course the ever so wonderful guidance of my friends, I have decided to simply jump in the stream. Maybe I'll learn to swim again. Well, if I don't then you people are there to throw in a life jacket anyway.

Here we go then. New chinese boxes reinvented, rejuvinated, reformed and reshuffled...the bigger and better version is now out!

Kudos!

In Circles

2008-04-13T14:57:00.000Z

There is a chair on castors, in my room

Into it I sit, rotating around, day and night.

I look above at the coved ceiling,

Swiveling in circles, with the hands of clock;

One round, two rounds, three rounds past

I still rotate around, day and night.

Now the walls begin to walk, and cupboards run,

I see colours and stars, and strange shapes in my eyes!

Then an angel descends from the clouds of my mind,

And gently removes and keeps my head aside.

I listen to my laughter, but forget my voice

I am still alive, but as if without a life;

Like the dervishes, I whirl around, my skirt flying by,

My red hat too, rotates around, day and night.

I feel like I am that little keyed doll,

That claps and jumps, with its rotating key.

I feel like the planets dancing around in sky,

Bored of revolving around the same old sun;

Even the lemon looks pretty same, like that sun

Now squeezed dry, into the cocktail of my memories.

I wish I was free again...

2008-04-13T14:56:00.000Z

I wish I was free again,

To live as I wished, doing things I love

None, with even a word would torment;

My heart of a child, in this innocent life,

Which like the soap bubbles, swells and bursts!

I wish I was free again,

Wearing the rustic robe of night,

I wish I could hide away…from this selfish world;

Rather than vanishing in the desert storms,

I would become the sand or winds or the oases!

I wish I was free again,

No life, no death, no ignorance, no escape

Just a rhapsodic release from this all,

Still only an enjambment, to the everlasting joy;

The joy of peace, of freedom!

I wish I was free again,

Looking through the window, at the empty street,

Listening to my goldfish, in its bowl breathe,

Following it through to crescendo…

…of its melody of life, so happy and so free!

2007-09-11T23:08:00.000Z

Looking at our lives..at the majority of us at least, its so funny not to miss the little fears and frustrations, anguishes and pains, our own little concepts of this life we live, our joys, pleasures, sorrows, inhibitions...all of these things. A little thing is made a big issue. We tend to complicate things a lot, and often blow them out of proportions. When in pain, we seek sympathy than support; when in joy, we forget everyone and become very selfish. Yes, we do say we are simply humans and these things are but instinctual to us. But is that really so? I mean, lets ponder over this bit a little more. Do we actually try changing ourselves for the better unless circumstances force us to? Do we accept our incapacities and incapabilities instead of hiding them? Why do we always tend to hide behind this mask of what we are not whenver forced by a situation to fall and accept defeat?

Life should be a pursuit of perfection, not of happiness; because perfect happiness comes only with perfect knowledge, the knowledge of self, of reality, of life...and perfect knowledge comes only when we manage to perfect ourself. Only when we become successful in taming the wild and drunken monkey of our mind do we ever encounter pure happiness. One should be able to distinguish between happiness and pleasures. That which lasts only for a short period of time is pleasure...its like the drops of water in an ocean which evaporate to fall from the heavens as rain only to vanish again but still giving joy to the innocent life for a while. Happiness, however, is eternal, like that vast ocean...ever so fathomless, ever so mysterious, ever so pure!

Most of our lives are spent hankering and craving for happiness. Even a little joy of a moment makes us feel we are happy when we are no more than pleased! We tend to believe that the road to happiness is contention of soul and that in order to be happy, we need to look beyond our very self. Staring happiness in its eyes though, we realize that this is wrong. Happiness arises only when we are at peace with ourself and to be at peace in such a way, we first need to confront our darker side. Shying away from this other half only makes things worse. Letting go of our inhibitions and accepting what we really and truly are, we become the divine force which sustains life. Becoming this force, we find peace and knowledge. With this comes the virtue of happiness. We first need to conquer our frail and timid half which on exposing itself looks very scary at first sight, but later we realize that it is just what we think it is and not what it really is!

The only way to attain eternal bliss and happiness is thus, to first become at peace with ourself. 'The Middle Way' teaches us how to attain this equilibrium. Excess of anything is wrong. Just as joy is followed by sorrow and sorrow by joy, we need to work our way through this minefield of opposites to reach the end, which we then understand is just the beginning. Instead of obstructing the flow of life, we should learn to flow with it. Life is not just a haphazard arrangement of incidents, it is an intricately designed facade which has a very deep and implicit meaning, only waiting to be unveiled.

2007-09-11T23:03:00.000Z

Recently I've been in a think-a-lot mode..forcing myself to find answers to certain questions I always wondered about. Following few posts will be about that. Nothing great really, just thought that I'd share this stuff here. Now these are no more than my answers for these questions but I couldn't help wonder how these complex questions of life and reality and truth can have such really simple answers.

So here we go.. :-)

2007-08-10T13:50:00.000Z

Life is that which you never knew it is; and when it starts unfolding, you realize that even you are not what you thought you were. Slowly and steadily as one comprehends the mysteries of this universe and begins to realize the truths of life, one begins to be isolated from the homogeneous monotony of the mundane realism. Whether this isolation is good or bad is yet another question but what is worth noting here is the immense potential which this isolation equips that individual with; the potential to become life itself in a way.

Everyone realizes the truth when their time comes, when their destinies mature, but it is this very truth that corrupts! When you see the joy as joy, the suffering as suffering, the pain as pain, the self as self, the illusion as illusion, the ignorance as ignorance and the escape therefrom as escape, you cease to be what you always believed you were. The reality as perceived by the ignorance bounded creatures of darkness becomes a mighty enemy of your selfless self, glorified by the eternal luminescence of that imperceptible and undescribable reality of all that there ever was, is and will ever be.

A fantasy although this may seem to be, it is the reality of our lives; a fantastic reality!

Death of the Man

2007-03-25T12:50:00.000Z

Revelations of what you see, and those of what I see too,

Infernal revelations from our primordial past;

Do shock us, but also soothe.

He speaks of honour and glory, bloody hypocrite!

Just as dreamily as he evoke the passions,

He uses the blood to stain the stream

Then in vain, with a peacock's feather he tries to paint;

The absurd in static, the surreal in facts.

I wonder, just as you would do,

What ticks his psyche's clock?

That heaving bosom, like the bellows of a blacksmith,

Germs a terror, or perhaps a fraility of some kind?

Back to wondering though, it does not stop,

But no answer I find, and neither would you;

Right, but who is he? And what is it in him...

...which makes him root in these fallacies?

Nobody knows, nor them, not you and neither do I;

But we remain stunned and petrified in horror,

When we beheld those hellish acts...oh devil be cursed!!

Questions...of life and death, of reality and dream...still horrify.

To my surprise, still, I remember I tried

With you, you know...to confront these dumb lies;

What we got though? Just a little more pain,

And an evening supper with the devil's clan!

How could a man, oh God how could he?!

Wreak such havoc in the nature's womb?

How could he...I beg to know, be unaffected...

...by his own diabolic acts? Is his conscience frozen??

If enslaving the niggers and coloured beasts were philanthropy,

Then I would rather eat a venomous feast and die;

If hubris were to be a virtue and lust the land's law,

A hungry lion in my face, to me would suffice!

Remember...they would wring the necks of men and animals alike,

And then in silver goblets, their blood-meals would proceed;

Followed by the succulent le bifteck de chair avec le sang,

Oh nevermind...they'd say, les autres attendront...as if they care!

Look there, you see those clergymen? Ha! They say...

...no, preach morelike; "the gospel of love" (and what do they do?)

Like how a bunch of pigs would happily bathe, in the grime of fresh hypocricy!!

Poor pigs, why blame them? Who are we to judge afterall?

You see, my heart aches and the soul goes numb,

As I continue to write this song;

Did I say song? Oh melodies be damned!!

I mean...this is but a tragedy of man...

The benign skies from above would laugh,

And the earth too would shy away;

The oceans, with the rivers would wash their face,

And trees would hide their's in disdain!

I see a change coming this way,

Perhaps quite tumultuous and grave;

Transformation to redeem this race of its sins,

As it walks silently, down the Hellespont.

Meanwhile, like a dumbstruck fool I wonder still,

Trying to figure out what I wish to know;

What makes the heart of a man? Is it the good or is it the bad?

Shades of both perhaps, for no poles exist in there.

Listen carefully...do you hear the sound? The choir plays a dirge,

And hermits clad in jet black robes too queue;

To mourn, or may be to celebrate the death of man...

...who lost the battle, before even knowing why!

"Blâmer le sort"...now you might say,

For what was his fault in this case?

I just grin and laugh inside, a few more join me too...

...you know, like how swans mock a crow?...just like that...

Bang! A rapturous rumble of the roaring skies,

Mark his end afteral...that brutal savage, forever damned!

A lightning strikes, followed by the rain, and it cleans...

...the earth from the plaques of man's deeds, ever so evil.

Zen Poetry

2007-02-19T20:01:00.000Z

Tao of Life

Go there, what has been abandoned by all,
Go there, where no life thrives;
And once you go, see that humming bee,
Smile to it, and it shall show you its hives.

Kensho

The lark above, it chases its prey,
Soaring through the winds gracefully it flies;
What an awesome scene! But I just smile…
…and the next moment, I am that lark.

Dialectics of Existence

The thirsty soil, drinks the tears of the sky,
And then under its lightning’s frenzy it burns;
But the rosebud grows full, to feed the bees,
And with its thorns, to bleed the gardener’s hands.

Dependent Co origination

The moon and the stars, on a summer’s night,
Play hide-and-seek in the clouds;
The owls hoot, the wolves howl, the frogs croak,
And the plants grow on their own.

“...Aniccho Hoti Nibbuto...”

Knock…knock…knock…
“who is it?”; “you know better…”
“is it that what you are, and unto it I be?”
“Ah! Now we are free!”

Echoes of Silence

2007-01-30T23:19:00.000Z

Echoes of silence, to my heart console

like rays of light, a dreary night illuminate;

cries and shrieks of my trembling self

go unheard...but you do know

for in the letters of gold, t'was on thy soul engraved.

Love, why you be not here? I ask myself...

thine whispers of hope, why can't I hear?

the naked truth, my vision of sight t'has stripped;

deeper and deeper into the abyss it falls,

the abyss...of this fathomless dream.

Suddenly, at once...a Magpie's nest,

catches its soul, by the thread of a grass

...in the silver moonbeams, as it rejuvinates...

the starlight fom above, spots its other half;

which in a kingdom faraway, sleeps a restless night.

Together then...in joy and innocence they bathe

...their being, faraway so, in a neverland's dream;

thus, one they become...for their spirits entwine,

the waves wash the shores! And then the sun off sea...

seal their fates to be one forever...those grains of sand.

Plop...plop...plop...as the raindrops drip,

their haunting sound turns my brows' wheel;

and then, faraway I disappear...

I fly away with the winds,

but in their hearts again, I reappear.

I return thus, I do return...where else would I go?

becoming the arrows of the divine archer winged,

with a stallion's speed, thy souls and hearts I pierce;

and by its mane, the course of life I steer,

life...mine and yours, and theirs and ours...

Woosh! though the candles burnt out,

their light still remains in my being...and says...

"To wither away and burn yourself...for them,

who in thy glory shine...life does be"

some live on...while some shed a silent tear.

And thus, without a sound...without any trace,

into the eternal you sublime; through me, and I in you,

only to wake up...to what we already knew.

which dream you talked of? and which dreamer?

For once, for others, for your other half,

you ceased to be...only to find the truth, the love and joy;

and just as you lost yourself in them,

in the life itself, you dissolved.

Just a shot of lightning though, and none remains,

one grieves, while the others sees joy;

and then the one enjoys...as the other,

...in his solitude, sheds his mien...in his tears.

and all this...t'was but a profanation of your soul,

which lost on its rambles on the lovely plains;

...now do awake...to the light of peace and love,

the echoes of silence whisper thus.

An old essay...title is missing...

2007-01-07T18:59:00.000Z

One of my old essays...just because I didn't post anything in a long time am posting this. Now when I read it just now I couldn't believe I wrote it...I can't even remember the meanings of a few words in it..lol..but its fun that way! :P

From the dawn of human civilization to this day, the pride of being a human has always remained the same. Times changed and so changed the circumstances, ages came and passed, and changed were the attitudes of folks, but what has remained constant is this pride, the identity of belonging to this mighty race. A day will come in time when man will be animal again. A journey back in time, to the origin; to the birth of life, to the day when first man treaded this planet. Our roots are strong; strong enough to stop us separate from the reality, strong enough to not let us drift away in the eternity; where there is no beginning and no end. How can we forget our past? It keeps peeping into the present every moment. A brief interplay of those ideas as if it were, being superimposed on the transitory present. Our past, won’t ever spare us, it would keep haunting us forever, just as it always did, is doing now, and will keep doing tomorrow; when the morrow will be today and today will be the day long past. From one point of view, we are no different; we have evolved from the primates after all, making us no different than those monkeys, stupidity and clumsiness being the most marked features. Still unsuccessful in taming our animal instincts, where do we head? Leaving behind our footmarks in time, building the milestones of each success achieved, and the most important of all, totally unaware of where we come from, where do we go? Come to think of it and reflect on the reality, the few of us understood that there is none beyond us. All that “is”, is in the here and now; all that is true is this very moment, it’s just our distorted perception that makes us conceive the one as many, and we perceive plurality in the one eternal and immutable singularity. It was same then, and not a bit changed even now, trying to catch a flying bird, leaving behind the one in hand has always been our favourite hobby. But who can help! We are monkeys nonetheless, just a little more evolved and a bit more sophisticated in our acts, that’s it. No more differences whatsoever.

Life itself is a big question, even more so, is how to live. The very thought of the answer being what we never expected it to be is somewhat irksome. We know that if we delve deeper into the ocean of existence, we will find the impeccable reality, somewhere at its bottom, but the hint of it being something totally out of the world prevents us from doing so, from even feeling the waters of the ocean, from even bothering to simply ponder on thought or imagination of its nature. Hiding behind the shadows of ignorance, we practically waste all our lifetime. Chasing false ideals, where do we end up? In the middle of nowhere, utterly confused and lost. This does create a pretty gory picture of reality, but is it really all that gloomy? Perception matters, what I may see as a half glass filled would be perceived by you as half empty. But one thing is for sure; there definitely is a way out, if at all we bother to try!

However, from the other viewpoint, we occupy the highest seat on the ladder of the degree of sentience. We boast the top position. Most superior of the animals, we claim to be the owners of this universe. But one question that consistently struck me was whether other animals believe similarly or not. Now we all know they certainly don’t. Most common of the rarely found sense can assure us about this. So what’s in us that makes us different? It’s not just like that, that we have reached till here. The answer is simple, we can think! Eureka!!! What a truth of life indeed it is! Analysing the silliest of our acts and clumsiest of the deeds, we can reach to one conclusion, it is not our achievements which make us proud, but it is this basic truth of life that we think, is where the pride has its origin. Most developed of the currently existing sentient beings, maybe we rightly deserve the right to occupy that top position and be proud. But it is this very fact, which makes us special. With great powers come great responsibilities, and perhaps Mr.Friedman was right, “there is no such thing as a free lunch.” There is a price for this upgraded version of life, which we ought to pay. Creativity and imagination are the only things, which make us what we are today. Incredible although they are, with the acquisition of these faculties comes a responsibility which we ought to fulfil, and that, precisely is the price!

We fall, we stumble, but it is the fact that we get up after each fall, determined even more and ready to go for it once more, which has helped our species to survive for so many millions of years of evolution. We rise with even more confidence, ever ready to face the challenge, to finally make it our slave, marching ever forward, achieving one success after another and cherishing the victories. Pride saves the day again! One of our ancestors faced extinction because they weren’t the best of the lot, but the sacrifice didn’t go in vain. We owe them our existence today, we owe it all to them, for without their sacrifice, we would have never come about. Why then, or rather, how then, did we manage to travel so long in time? How was it possible for us to come this far? The journey was never an easy one, neither was it supposed to be. Treading through the span of millions and billions of years, we did manage to reach this point safely and sanely (although sanity is highly doubtful). But couldn’t it be the fact that we did managed to come till here, which implies that our existence serve a purpose? Couldn’t it be this very fact which is the long lost secret of existence? Devoid of divinity, as it is, in the here and now, lying bare in front of our eyes, how did we not manage to spot it before? Well, many of us did, but the others of us were too proud to pay any heed. Revisiting it though, wouldn’t it be of the utmost delight that we have finally found the grail? Perhaps we stretched our imaginations a bit too much in its search. What lied at the feet was being searched all around, everywhere else. However, now that we know it, we are at the perfect time to repay the price of being what we are. One thing is for sure; we can never get away with it. We must repay the debts of nature, and so we would. Have we another choice?

To sum it all up, the facts prove themselves. The truth is simple, “live and let live”, go against it, and we face the consequences, live by it, and we see the life! That is what our responsibility is, being not the “only” ones to be on this planet. We do not own this universe; we share it. We do not rule the existence; we are an indivisible part of it. Our role is that of the guardians of this wonderland. Our role is to ensure harmony in it. Our job is to make peace. Although an ultimate ‘Utopia’ can never be achieved, we are obliged to achieve whatever we can, reach the highest degree of perfection, get as close as we can, to that unattainable Utopia. Whatever we do, are we ready to take the responsibility? Or will we let ourselves down? Only time can tell what we do, but there are only two things, which could happen, we would either keep developing, provided we fulfil our responsibility, or face extinction. The choice is ours; after all we possess a thing called ‘free will’!

The Parody of Fools

2006-12-29T10:20:00.001Z

In all their pompous glory & beautiful coloured forms,

The flock of merry gypsies, set asail the grasslands

like summer storms; there was not a thing to wonder;

T'was a monotony of each day, new places each day to see

and strange people to meet...fine play!

Showing off their crochet hats, the men; and maidens,

their patched linen skirts; displaying the fake jewles

which adorned their ears and necks, and the bells

on their bags, clinging with breeze...

...the flock kept its pace.

The men who rode the horses, seldom at their wives would see,

but never did they miss a chance to glimpes,

The bare-backs of young ladies on the streets;

Occasionally, even sneaking out at nights,

to warm their beds with their passions' torch

Which scorched their lusts and burnt their hearts,

but lo! their life indeed was so gay...!

And the women? What of them?

Was their moral fudge all sweet? Or did it have the fungi warts too?

and well...all knew it did!

In every village and town they passed,

the tormented losers with their broken hearts,

Would come to seek the crystals' advice,

which the gypsy maids used to contemplate on their pasts

and then putting together the designs mistique, the future

would be gazed to reveal the brightest hour;

Consoling those snipes at least for some time,

Making them believe their lives won't go astray.

Instead, their carracks shall safely sail,

The violent tempests of their fates.

The play thus, goes on for many a days

those fools would always of frustrations die,

But who cared? the fortune-tellers got their share!

Ceremoniously on sundays, the rams and bulls,

would be slaughtered and with festive joy consumed...

...of course after the ritual screeching of "Hail Mary...Our Lady..."

Poor frogs would even, then stop to croak, but filled with glee,

for at least they could sing much better!

As the nights would fall, the flocks would halt,

to rest the bums of tired horsemen...which sored,

bumping against the rotten leather saddles.

Thus to rest, they all would retire and sleep...

and on one fine day, none would ever wake up again!

Thus, their lives, would come and go,

Not one bothered, nor caring to know

From nowhere they appeared, and back there they go,

But who cares to understand the lesson...

...which with them, in their graves do go?

T'is as common as the seasons or tides,

or as simple to know of the bees' vice

Why then don't we listen?

Is it just so disgraceful to soil our ears?

Oh! of is the wise is the one who knows naught?!

Ha! Human folly, what a glory...

Their empires rise and fall to dust

Their balloons of inflated prides do burst

What they do...in it lies their misery

What they think...in it lies their doom!

Their stings are filled with venoms raw,

nor bees, nor snakes, nor scorpions compete

These stings are their words, their merry rhymes...

...which they play on the organ of their defiled tongue!

No weapons they need, no canons to fire

No forts, no castles, no shields...no wars to win;

They speak...and their worlds are destroyed!

The sun and the moon and the heaven's lights,

The seas and the clouds and the mighty skies;

with peity and disgust they gaze these flocks,

The flocks of animals, in human form!

The children divine of eternal light,

Like the specks of dust, which on a sunbeam's a blight;

and their shadows thus cast, on the mirrors of thoughts,

which illude them, and seal their fates' locks...forever!

These are the ones who know what they are,

yet, they know not, what they wish to know

and so as they are, conned and decieved by life,

They fall deepre and deeper in the labyrinths...of hellish delight.

What hell though and which heavens ?

They are, their God's greatest plight;

Their God, dear God, the emperor of these goons...

and hence one too, the lazy fairy's boon!

but hail! to the ones who thought this up, and now...

...they know not how!

But well, they at least make their ancestors proud,

What a proof this is...that they come from apes;

and are not the charlatans of divine grace!

Poor things, lost souls, they shall wander forever;

In the stretches of life's eternal sketch.

The lands where they will, never find what they seek,

The treasures...oases, thich they know don't exist!

And thus, we sum up, the parody of fools...who have all,

except some faith...no faith they have, in their hearts;

No faith in the little miracles of life, No faith, not at all...

...in the dreams they percieve.

Hence, they wander and wander along,

In search of just a word, which would free them all...

...but that one word, they know not, is within their heads;

Like a needle lost, in a huge haystack.

Ha! they prove t'is grass stuffed upstairs!

_____________________________________________

P.S.: This parody is in noway racist or discriminatory...I have nothing whatsoever against gypsies, it's just an analogy.

El Rumbo de la Vida

2006-12-13T15:44:00.001Z

El rumbo de la vida, se parece tanto al rio,

El río del amor, el río de la lluvia;

La lluvia...y su agua celestial.

Aunque empiece pequeño,

Lentamente crece inmenso;

Aunque primeramente parece insconstante,

luego se va calmando.

El rumbo de la vida, se parece tanto al río,

Nos somos las ojas de otoño;

En su fluego tranquilo.

Dejar atrás qué ha pasado,

Siempre adelantar...como el tiempo;

No preocupar nunca...acerca del futuro,

Siempre adelantar.

El rumbo de la vida, se parece tanto al río,

Con sólo una meta...

...de alcanzar el mar.

Viviendo...sólo este momento,

Nada mas...continúemos fluyendo;

Apagando la sed de los transeúntes,

Continúe fluyendo...debajo del cielo abierto.

El rumbo de la vida, se parece tanto al río,

El río del amor, el río de la lluvia;

La lluvia...y su agua celestial.

__________________________________________________________

The course of life, it's so much like a river,

The river of love, the river of rain;

Rain...and its heavenly waters.

Although it starts small,

Slowly it becomes huge;

Although it seems fickle at first,

Later...it calms down.

The course of life, it's so much like a river,
We are like autumn leaves;

Which flow with the tranquil flow,

Leaving behind what is passed,

Always going on...like time;

Never preoccupied about the future

Always going on.

The course of life, it's so much like a river,
With only one goal...

...to meet the sea.

Living only in this moment,

Nothing else...we flow on;

Quenching the thirsts of passers by,

Flow on...under the open sky.

The course of life, it's so much like a river,
The river of love, the river of rain;
Rain...and its heavenly waters.

Go On...!

2006-12-10T16:43:00.001Z

Try not to make your life just long,
But try and make it contented and strong

It's not your Needs but Deeds that count,
It's the seeds of love that you sow count;

The power of eternity lies with you,
And this is a fact not very new

Then why you let your work unfulfilled?
The kingdom of humanity you have to build,

So go on, now go on, just go on and on,
For only you can bring over a bright new dawn!

Carry Me On Your Morning Wings

2006-12-10T15:53:00.000Z

Carry me on your morning wings,

O dawn carry me to the sky...

Chasing the winds and over the clouds,

up above the rainbow high;

It's to the sun I want to go...

...away from the cold bleak night,

Breaking all bonds with the mortal world

to experience the feeling divine.

Carry me on your morning wings,

O dawn carry me up high...

It's the soothing cool warmth of the early sun

I want to feel and enjoy;

Take me there on your morning wings

where everything is just fine,

No drop of rain, no burning flame

would disturb me as all's just fine.

Carry me on your morning wings,

O dawn carry me to the sky...

I want to count the countless clouds,

And feel the timeless light;

Take me where pure love is abound,

and is eternal indeed...

And only sound that you can hear,

is the waltz of love resound.

The Spring

2006-12-10T15:40:00.000Z

My rain dance lasted for night long

But now its dawn I see,

And it is the time to sing the song

from so long I wanted to sing.

I sing about the merry birds

I sing of nature's bliss,

I sing the song of picturesque woods

That stand lifeless and still.

Silhouette of dawn in woods looks like

spotlighting first flower of spring,

And wood-winds making it gently rock

On the rhythm of gushing streams.

The snow on the branches is melting now

Exposing the lichens beneath,

And ugly moths breaking their cocoons

transform to butterflies, as we dream.

The joyous ants are again on their march

Celebrating the arrival of spring,

And squirrels coming out of their holes say

"Rejoice!" for it is the 'spring'.

_________________________________________

This is one of the old poems I wrote last year.

Untitled

2006-12-02T10:26:00.000Z

__________________________________

On the roof I lay,
watching the clouds;
and then the stars at night,
Ah! a rose just did pout!

Wait! it's not a stone,
it screamed just now;
but why does it hide?
Think not more, for you know why.

Look into my eyes though,
and see thyself;
but when I look in thine,
It's the eternity me sees.

So you say you know it all?
then look at this stick;
tell me what it is,
don't know why, I just see the sand!

A sphere in a sphere,
and just void in between;
nothing else, there be...
so where is the child you see?

Giant waves of the oceans blue,
sweep the shores each day;
but what do they leave behind?
A shell..in which our worlds be!

Winds too blow the leaves now,
of the flaming trees of autumn red;
they do go far away...yes they do,
but they return fresh and green.

So only this water, my concern be
and the pitcher it lives, does not;
oh! a thorn in my foot..what a shame!
I love it still, now it does be mine!

________________________________

Dumb right? Not really...think! ;)

Confessions of a Fanatic.

2006-11-21T21:22:00.000Z

Treading through the shadows, alone I walked

On the path which has no ending, and no start;

Cutting through the mist, alone I sailed

In the sea of tears of innocent wails;

Mesmerized, Hypnotized, Bewitched my soul had been

For millions of aeons, land I had not seen;

Locked up in the prison, of virtual walls

Never did I realize, that pride is followed by a fall;

Living like a fool, conforming with the herd

The picture of reality, thus becoming blurred;

Thinking that I am right, and the world is wrong

My ego had controlled me, for very long;

Unaware of my identity, being forever lost

Wretched I had become, like the one in 'Faust';

Unable to distinguish, the right and wrong

The true forces were becoming, unbearably strong;

There, just in front of me, was standing my doom

For any sort of doubt now, there was no room;

Running behind false ideals, all my life

Unaware of the reality, I had been;

I was dreaming to be a martyr and attain the 'Paradise'

Which in existence...never had been;

Scared I was, of some imaginary 'GUY'

With my true nature, I was refusing to comply;

O dear! I regret, what had I done;

In the name of something, which is nomore than a pun!

One more ring now, I have added to the chain;

Which binds me to this world, so mortal and profane!

The Epitaph

2006-11-11T12:25:00.000Z

Shhhh...!! Say no more, let me enjoy this solitude now;
See for yourself, the bliss it brings along.
Can you hear now...my soul screams your name...
But alas! what can I do...I be there no more.
How shall I convince thy innocent heart?
Its laments I cannot see! But still thou be...
...the one you were, although time hath changed me.

Ask not again, for thou dost know, I have nothing to say;
Ask not though, but once...for I do have something to say.
Clueless I be, but still I must get done what is ought to be done;
Hence, this moment, I beseech thee...so look into my eyes.
Can you see, what I wish to say?
Can you hear what I wish to show? No! not the tears...
...for they won't stop; I ask thee once more, come near.

Did the thrush deliver my songs to you?
Did the flowers make thee cry?
And then did the butterflies catch those tears?
Oh! tears no more my love, now cheer!!
Look at the sun, setting behind those hills;
And behold the beauty of dusk, and rain showering...
...its heavenly pearls, shalt cheer thee up for sure!

Close thy eyes, and know it now; what has passed...
...cannot be changed. Past no more thy enemy be,
Live right now, right here. What of me? I be no more;
I lay in peace, love and no fear. Look up, and read those lines,
The epitaph says...mourn not, my love, be brave.
Thy floods of tears, won't bring me back; I live eternally,
in the memories we both cherished.

Forgive me though, no valediction I bade;
But wasn't it then for good? I never went,
I always was and will always be, in your heart...
...I belong nowhere, but there...forever.
This little rose, now that you put on my grave,
Indeed dost make me cry. But helpless I be...
...for we do know; that corpses cannot cry!

Rainbow of my Dreams

2006-10-05T20:50:00.000Z

I see a rainbow in the sky,

the rainbow of all those dreams;

All the dreams which I had seen,

and those wchich everyone see.

I look at the nimbus cleared sky,

which just showered the virgin rain;

The rain which sowed the seeds of life,

In the womb of barren earth's terrain.

The miracle of life, has manifested now,

Alas! but my eyes can't behold;

For this beauty I feel, is far beyond,

the springs of blessed mortal joy.

A fool indeed I ought to be,

who desires none but life itself;

A fool indeed I ought to be,

who fears none but fear itself.

Haunt me O wisdom! I stand before thee,

I turn the wheels of life, with my every wink;

Else I wish to drown and die,

in the deluge of my destiny.

I know for what I cometh here,

thy pranks shalt not work on me;

I hold the key to thy future, O wisdom!

only if thy wisheth to see.

Now I fly with lovley birds in sky,

up above the rainbow I see;

Together we span the oceans wide,

which start as a little stream.

Inexorable I know, my fate is indeed,

for I follow the path of my heart;

The heart which bore all those dreams,

the dreams of living again as a seed.

Rainbow, no more I wish to see,

for I see beyond its mien;

I bathe in the spring of first sulphur,

Which dissolves myself in thee.

Magic of Dawn.

2006-09-19T21:59:00.000Z

Into the gentle embrace of night,

how calmly dawn does sleep;

Like a child with a smile on its face,

in the laps of his mother it dreams.

Slowly it awakes from the shadows of dark,

to a bright new day it rise;

Dusting away its lazy sleep,

spreading across the skies.

Tenderly knocking the nests of aves,

whose young ones on the boughs do rock;

Together they sing to welcome the morn,

along with their friends in flocks.

The saffron tinted sky of dawn,

across the ocean green tis'streatched;

With the display of light's interplay,

Which the artist in his easle has sketched.

Cold breeze blowing through the clouds,

carries the scent of musk;

O'er the land as it comes,

Carries with it the dusk.

Mesmerising indeed, is this beauty divine,

raptures the joy, like a young ravine;

Consuming my soul and mind it says...

seek me oh wise! for your truth is also mine.

When Angels Save the Dead

2006-09-16T12:36:00.000Z

An ocean of eternity waits
but the lapse of tides go on;
And still I wander like a lost soul,
in the alleys of life so dark.

Shadows of past haunt this day,
and shall haunt the morrow as well;
when storms are the pavers of our path,
what more can we expect?

Sorrows measure fathoms deep,
and you drown in the ocean of tears!
But the sight of your angel there for you
Wipes out all your fears.

There, to save you, it appears,
guised as an innocent lamb;
To lift you from this deadly strife,
and help you to repent?

But those who know nothing of this,
how shall they be prepared?
Will they perish and become the dust,
or will they meet their angel as well?

But when angels save the deads of ever,
need be for them to repent?

Who Am I?

2006-09-16T12:32:00.000Z

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Am I the mortal bond of men,

or am I a the freedom of birds?

Am I the path of lonely hearts,

or am I the sound of worlds?

Am I the water of gushing streams,

or am I the melody of reeds?

Am I the light of hopless darks,

or am I the begger on streets?

Am I the fragrance of daffodils,

or am I a pearl of dews?

Am I the smile of an innocent child,

or am I the truth all knew?

Am I the edge of the sword of truth,

or am I the valour of knights?

Am I the charm of the 'maggi' devine,

or am I the koans of 'wu'?

Am I the suffering of ignorants,

or am I the wisdom of wise?

Am I the one who really exists,

or am I spirit of light?

Am I 'duende' of all that is,

or am I the shower of rain?

Am I the one to see the end,

or am I the one to be slain?

What am I and who am I,

I know none about...

But one thing that I know for sure,

is...I am a hermit, who sings his dirge!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

.....wink, and everything is changed!! ;)

Revelations

2006-09-16T12:27:00.000Z

"People say nothing changes overnight, but I don't agree. Even a moment enough to change your life; and you don't even need any big thing to bring about this change. Anything works...a lightning, a thunderstorm, breeze kissing your face on a sunny day even; a drop of rain, or a smile of an innocent soul even; melodies of birds or tunes of the angels' harps even. Changes occur every moment, we just don't understand them. Everything you do, everything you think, everything you plan changes the world. Each of these things have their own importance, their own place in the hierarchy of existence! But imagine thinking about this without language. Can you think without language? There would have been no reality without language, but isn't it also true that there would have been no language without reality? But what comes first? Time it seems to stretch for eternity and all these things occur in it. What exactly is eternity? Can we really see it in a grain of sand, as Blake thought? What is time? Does time run faster than thoughts or do the thoughts determine its passage? What if a hundred years are to be contained in a minute, and a hundred such minutes in a second; a hundred such seconds again in a momeny and this single moment lasts only so long as it takes for you to wink your eyes?! All your lives and all your deaths, all your acts and all your deeds come and go in this one moment but it lasts for an eternity!
You live for this one moment, yet we say there is no such moment to live in; and when it comes to an end, you realise that it were your deeds which determined the length of this moment. Some make it last for a second, others stretch it for an eternity; while the others live as if they would never die, and then die as if they never lived!! As it comes to an end, you start realiseing the truths. Some awake at the right time, while others never drop their slumber. Whatever they do, one thing is for sure, the truth starts unfolding only when your time comes, not a moment before. You understand that you tried to run with time, but when reality was that there was no time to run with! You live as a slave of your ego, bragging about your achievements, showing off your deeds and acts, but when the truth was that there was nothing to be achieved and no you to achieve anything. We exist as a thought, and yet there is no mind to think us; we are bound by its imagination, but we are itself the one who imagines and the one who is bound in illusion...it's too absurd to be real, but at the same time it is too complex to be real.
You never lived your life, you start realising...all you did was living with it!! You unleashed your vengeance on your enemies, but did you ever realise that you yourself are your friend and you yourself are your foe?! Hot or cold, water never changes, all that changes is the way your hand feels it, you start realising. You imposed senseless restrictions on yourself for no reaons, but you were never bound by anything; freedom was always yours, you simply failed to recognise it! You never realised the one ultimate truth...that there is nothing without you, and you are nothing without anything else! All you ever sought was always within you, you just had to search it!
Everyone's turn comes when your destiny reaps, soul's dreams start manifesting and your heart shows you the way. All you are supposed to do is to follow it!!!"

I can never forget these words of "WU"! Revelations at its best. Why then, I don't understand, do they discriminate and boast about trivial things? Well, that's why I believe they call it a game of chance, not everyone's chance come at the same time! I thought I should share them with all of you.

Nil Desparandum...Nosce te Ipsum...Et Curum!!